My Newest Impractical Peace Plan

I’m so jealous of Switzerland. Those neutral bastards found the perfect scam to avoid being attacked. Terrorists and dictators don’t even consider attacking Switzerland because that country is famous for being, well, the country you don’t consider attacking. That’s what I call good homeland defense.

It’s too late for America to try the neutrality scam. And no one in their right mind would believe it if we tried. We need our own scam to avoid being attacked. I think I have an idea.

Obviously we’d have to stop attacking other countries, no matter how tempting it seems at the time. And we’d need to cut back on the “all options are on the table” talk. That sort of thing makes other countries jumpy. Presumably we only do those sorts of things for tortured reasons of self-defense, but a country with a good Switzerland-like concept doesn’t need so much self-defense.

First, some background to explain where my idea comes from. I might have the history wrong, since I’m working partly from memory, but I think it goes like this. In the late eighties, President Reagan was starting to get chummy with Gorbachev, the head of the Soviet Union, our Cold War nemesis. In 1988, a devastating earthquake hit the Soviet Union. Reagan offered the help of the United States.

http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1079/is_n2143_v89/ai_7465081

Millions of Americans donated money to help the earthquake victims in the Soviet Union. I remember giving some money myself, before I had much to give. And I literally remember standing in my kitchen in San Francisco and thinking “Why do we have nuclear missiles aimed at each other?” It suddenly seemed a little extra absurd.

In June of 1989, the Iron Curtain started to come down. Historians say it was Reagan’s military build-up that caused the Soviet Union to see the futility of the Cold War. I think it was the earthquake that caused them to see the absurdity of being enemies with a country that has your back when things get bad.

A good definition of “friend” is someone who offers help when you need it, and from whom you would be willing to accept it. Reagan’s offer of assistance after the earthquake, and Gorbachev’s acceptance, made us friends in fact if not yet in policy. The rest followed naturally.

Okay, so my plan is this. America becomes the disaster recovery center of the world. To some extent, we already are. We generally offer help when needed, and we have lots of assets for that sort of thing. But we haven’t taken it to the next level and “Switzerlandized” the concept. We need to be more known as the country that finds people under rubble, as opposed to our current plan of being known as the people who put people there in the first place.

Think of it this way: Who attacks a hospital? Even terrorists avoid that sort of target. America could become, with the right PR, the world’s disaster recovery go-to nation. We could even sign agreements with other countries offering our help in the event of natural disasters, no strings attached. If a country accepts that offer of help in advance, they become friends in fact, and it makes any actions to the contrary seem absurd to them internally. How much of your money are you willing to spend trying to kill the people who will help you when the earthquake comes? It makes more sense to attack Switzerland.

We could even charge for our world-class disaster recovery service, with a sliding price scale depending on the GDP of the nation affected. Germany would pay top dollar. North Korea would be free.

The beauty of this plan is that while Americans would not want to fund direct foreign aid to unpopular nations, few people would object to helping in the event of a natural disaster. And because of the “insurance” nature of the model, we would be giving something of great value to all nations while only spending the money for a few actual disasters. And best of all, we’d have the best disaster recovery resources for our own disasters when needed, especially if global warming pushes the hurricanes into overdrive.

We’d still need a bad-ass military, just in case. But it would be efficient if they were trained for dual purposes, both fighting and disaster recovery.

This plan is impractical of course, as are all of my peace plans. I just think it’s entertaining to figure out why.

Comments

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[briang]

Can Scott Adams replace an entire think tank? I think yes:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/oneworld/20070614/wl_oneworld/45361502941181864006;_ylt=AgiP4iOSpbHSpt7NbpbJcEcE1vAI

[Bogart]

This Plan shall be a Cornerstone to the Foundation of Flipping IT!! Collectively we who get IT can Flip what is NOW to what SHOULD BE by 2011. Scott's plan speaks volumes to what should be.

Remember, Aztec's believe that "The Last Great Human Destruction" occurs in 2011.

On what side of the X will you stand?

Flip IT!

[Turil]

*clap, clap, clap*

This is the kind of thinking that will get us out of the messes we've been getting ourlselves into. And I don't think it's at all practical. A bit overly simplistic, maybe, but definitely practical.

[Gimble]

We already give, give, give. And don't think they won't attack a hospital. They have shown no remorse or concern for the innocent; no respect for education or the well being of others.

[TSSP]

The Soviet Union collapsed due to the system (communism) being corrupt, from the inside. Regan had little to do with it.

If you haven't already watch the series of Documentaries by Adam Curtis (Power of Nightmares\The Trap\Mayfair Set), you'll find them on youtube\google video - I think you will like them.

[matt]

filthy liberal.

[Martin]

Of course, it is easy to remain neutral if you are the country who looks after everyone's money with few questions asked...

[Krishnan]

Switzerland are not being attacked as the leaders of the world (including the terrosrist leaders) have their money there!!!

[CKGO]

Scott,

I like your ideas. They are common sense but impractical and the world needs a lot of common sense.

[Prasanth]

Scot, the plan is too good, but it is highly impractical as US is not good enough for that. Any nation which is able to implement this will be a land of saints.. and US is no way close to that (the means are too selfless and kind for and end that is too selfish.. this simply cannot exist.. means should justify ends and vice-versa)

comments about some comments:

1. Please stop assuming that US is the only rational country and terrorists are born bad, brutal people. (for all the comments which said terrorists will kill, no matter what)

2. US is not just the country that helps nations recover, but also the one which destroyed many nations, just because they were communist or getting in the way of its world domination (for all the comments which said that US already helps by providing drugs etc.). btw.. don't understand why US gets so anal about communist regimes, esp. when they are not forced on them... guess it was just a pretext to attack the only other country which threatened its domination during the cold war period...

3. there are just too many rogues who are/were funded by US in different time periods (including Osama once)... to reach their ends of world domination (in those times, they never threatened well-being of US citizens).. u r just reaping the rewards now... a bit too late for the plan maybe.. but if implemented, it will atleast help your future generations (but i suspect if your selfishness will help in saving your unborn grandchildren... am too cynical about this)

3. Even US attacked hospitals in Iraq, as they suspected Saddam to be hiding within. If you can justify this action, then I am sure terrorists will have their reasons

Bottomline: I am not saying that terrorists are good, but neither is US... good luck.. a fight between bad vs. bad, which is getting ugly... i am curious about the result :)

[Martin]

This idea is genius. I think you should try to promote it. It would certainly up the esteem in which I currently hold the US from not much to a lot.

[T.H.Reasoner]

I think you're right that helping out our neighbors when they have a disaster could help promote a little goodwill - until they weigh it against all the harm we do in the world. Noel and Stomper are on the right track; if we want to eliminate terrorism, we must address everyday poverty, powerlessness and ignorance like that displayed by Muttley who needs to turn off the Fox News channel and read a book - I recommend "The True Believer" by Eric Hoffer.
The terrorists don't hate us for our freedom; they hate us for our gluttonous consumption and the fact that we prop up their oppressors.
It's true that we already spend money on foreign aid but as swiss points out, the Danes give a much higher percentage of GDP, 12.8% versus US, 0.7% putting US at #18 on the list, although, the US still gives the most money. The problem is most US aid is developmental and comes with plenty of strings attached and aids the donor more than it aids the recipient: "If we give you this money, you must use it to buy our food/construction equipment/military hardware, from this US company and oh by the way, you also have to stop passing out condoms."
Starving people don't need an electrical outlet to plug in a toaster, they need food to eat and clean water to drink and a safe place to sleep. Dropping bombs and spouting inane rhetoric doesn't provide any of those things.

[Dave]

Terrorists won't attack a hospital?

You haven't been in Tal A'Far Iraq have you? We had to occupy the hospital because terrorists and competing tribes had taken it over. They then regularly attacked the US and Iraqi troops there.

Terrorists attack anything.

But, overall, your concept has some merit.

[Rich]

Terrorists and dictator don't attack Switzerland because that is were they keep all of their money. If you are stealing from your people you have to put the cash somewere.

Even mentalists like Hitler knew that you don't rob your own bank.

[swiss]

foreign aid: the USA gives less in percentage of its GDP than Denmark.

referring to a nation as 'bastards' probably ain't the quickest way to make friends, by the way

[Paul]

Sounds good to me. I always thought that we ought to get other countries to pay for our (UK) military budget, since most of their work was helping out other countries. Certainly a preferable option to the nervousness the US makes around the world as it seeks to export our brand of democracy ...

And you're coming from the same place as Bono/Macphisto ...
"It's no secret that a friend is someone who lets you help.
It's no secret that a liar won't believe anyone else."

[Andi]

I don't agree with your prices. We Germans still have to pay for the reunion with our eastern part fifteen years ago; a phenomenon, which is obviously caused by the american policy of not letting us fall into Stalin's hands in the fifties. If the US only had shown a little interest in middle Europe, all of Germany would be economically devastated the same way, and we wouldn't have to pay "top dollar". I insist, that we are rated somewhere between the Czech Republik (higher growth rate) and North Korea (smaller poeple).

[Richard Gosling]

I love the idea. All nations with functioning governments comprised of (at least some) rational leaders will love America. That could even include Iran. For that reason alone it's worth doing.

The problem is that these nations aren't declaring war on America (why would they, they know they'll lose - even Iran would never declare war on America, they just hate America for its support of Israel). The people attacking America are a disparate group of nutters not acting on behalf of any nation, but bound together by an ideology. This action won't change their ideology, so they won't stop attacking America.

It could still help, though, since there may be less folk who want to support the ideological nutters, by funding them or giving them places to hide.

But this is a long-term solution - it still offers no solution to what the hell do we do about Iraq? Any plan that involves not having US soldiers driving about in armed Hummers for at least another year or two will always leave the US being branded as "The country that f***ed up Iraq and then abandoned them to brutal civil war", a brand that will not easily be replaced as "The country that helps anyone in a natural disaster". Unless there is a MASSIVE earthquake in Iraq in the near future...

[Tomas]

Well yes, being friendly, trying to get along with people and not representing yourself as ignorant asshole is generally a good peace strategy.

Greetings from Lithuania

[loupgarou]

not practical cos you got a bunch of religious zealots trying to start up wwIII armageddon as the prelude to the Rapture.

[Sofia]

Sounds like a God Father -plan to me...

[MH]

not long after 9/11 there was a doco on New Zealand TV where they were interviewing one of the main saachi & saachi (big advertising company) guys. He said something about how as soon as 9/11 happened, NZ should've immediately sent a big team of people over to new york to help the cleanup and rescue operation and performed a haka at ground zero to kick it off. Cheesy, but can you imagine the good PR New Zealand would've gotten wolrdwide for doing that. Advertising guys generally have to know a bit about producing good PR so I doubt he was far off the mark. Your theory reminded me of that

[OJ]

How depressing... I came on here to make the comment "Wow - what a great plan, even if it is impractical, it's a step in the right direction - thinking about how countries can help each other, rather than hurt each other"...

Then I saw all the other 'nay-sayer' comments, and general pessimistic moaning about how nothing you do will ever work...

It's gonna be a long hard fight to put the world to rights, and it's only going to be slowed down by people sitting and complaining, instead of directing their efforts into something positive.

Maybe I am too optimistic about people, but it seems to me that a good idea is worth trying out. Certainly better than letting the bad ideas win by default.

:)

[OJ]

How depressing... I came on here to make the comment "Wow - what a great plan, even if it is impractical, it's a step in the right direction - thinking about how countries can help each other, rather than hurt each other"...

Then I saw all the other 'nay-sayer' comments, and general pessimistic moaning about how nothing you do will ever work...

It's gonna be a long hard fight to put the world to rights, and it's only going to be slowed down by people sitting and complaining, instead of directing their efforts into something positive.

Maybe I am too optimistic about people, but it seems to me that a good idea is worth trying out. Certainly better than letting the bad ideas win by default.

:)

[Nimrod]

It's impractical because it's obviously pretentious. Better to stick to Reagan's model of just plain helping those in need, rather than drawing up contracts ensuring that kind of help at a later date. And when the help is delivered, it would be like mechanical sex.

If you want to think about it purely in economic terms, Reagan's model may not generate any income, but at least it might reduce the costs of war. Unfortunately that's hard to measure, so people aren't likely to promote foreign aid as a policy.

The best you can do is hope for a leader who already has "compassion for others" in their character.

[TallDave]

Also, if we were neutral, South Korea would not exist, Israel would have the site of a second Holocaust, and Taiwan would be part of communist China.

Oh, and the Soviets would not only have rolled right through Afghanistan and taken the Mideast, they'd probably be wrapping up a bow on Central and South America and thinking hard about Canada.

The triumph of liberal democracy was not inevitable.

[Boris Ivanov]

Terrorists do attack hospitals. Chechen terrorist Shamil Basaev became famous after Budyonnovsk hospital hostage crisis.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budyonnovsk_hospital_hostage_crisis

They also do attack schools and theaters.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beslan_school_hostage_crisis

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moscow_theater_hostage_crisis

If you need hundreds of weak and defenceless hostages, hospitals and schools are perfect targets. Sad but true.

[Switzerland under threat form islamic terrorism]

Scott, Switzerland is a bad example for neutrality. Switzerland imported muslim extremists for some years. Terrorist threats are very much present as just recently published by the Swiss governement.

http://www.swissinfo.org/eng/swissinfo.html?siteSect=881&sid=7878393

No strategy is working against people believing in god.

[Gaurav]

just saw a hindi(indian) movie... where the hero(Amitabh Bacchan) comes up with his own peace plan...

see basically who wants people to live longer so that they can profit from it... or rather who is at loss when people die... insurance companies and agents of course...

so all we need to do is to make open employement offer to terrorists from these companies... somehow get them all in and wham nobody would be killing anymore...

[Shai]

First of all, stop trying to be perfect. Second, stop assuming that because something worked before in one situation, it'll work again. Every situation is different and is a gamble. Third, don't be pollyanish and believe that Russia thinks we were covering their back. Remember Bush's "I can see into his heart" statement about Putin? Putin stabbed Bush in the back - that's clear now.

Last, what some of you are missing is that Scott's idea has been tried and doesn't work. America's enemies will just say that the CIA was behind the hospital bombing so that it could look good by cleaning it up, whether they believe that or not. Just like JFK, the 9/11 tragedy, and every other thing, the moonbats are going to paint the US as wrong.

No matter how you try, everything you do will be interpreted and spun against you. Look what the left, the non-aligned nations of the UN, NGO organizations, and the Arab nations do to Israel. No matter how hard Israel tries, no matter what it gives up for nothing in return, in the end it's about Israel-as-such, not about "occupation" or "land" or anything else. The only compromise Israel's enemies will accept is its dismantlement, and they say this loud and clear, and they haven't been stopped because the ENTIRE WORLD thinks they can be bought off free - with Israrel. But you just know that if that were to happen, they'd find something else to fight about amongst themselves. If they didn't have Israel, they'd have to invent it. You can bet that they won't stop there.

Is that what you want for yourselves?

There is no option other than playing these terrorists at their own game. You have to send in small groups, not large armies, who assassinate everybody who resists. Take out their leaders and soldiers one by one. Instill respect, show you follow through, infiltrate with collaborators and save those who actually DO want to live in peace from the fanatics amongst them who love war.

If you can't do that, sell your army and become Switzerland, and learn Arabic or Chinese, because the USA will soon be washed over with fear and will be taken over by people who have no scruples as you do.

Understand that the interest of America's enemies is not to be friendly with America, and it doesn't matter what America does to try and change anything. That's why they're called "enemies". Like I think Machiavelli said, it's better to be respected than loved. It's as true now, unfortunately, as then when he penned those words.

[Bill]

As usual your plan is better than what the US kleptocracy actually does. It does have the flaw that the US doesn't actually have any money to help anyone; the government just borrows more from overseas every year.... and someday the Chinese will wise up and quit buying 30-year Treasuries that won't be worth anything in ten years.

[Ellendra]

Actually, terrorists do bomb hospitals. Regularly. Along with kindergarten classes and places of worship. These are the kinds of targets terrorists go for. That's what makes them different from "freedom fighters".

And, among the reasons no one invades the Swiss is because they have the largest militia in the world. Not an army, a militia. Every single household is armed and trained, which means every inch of that country is defended to the gills.

Incidentally, they also have to lowest crime rate per capita of any country on Earth.

-Ellendra

[WT Harmon]

"And thoes how think Switzerland is neutral i have some news for you they soled wapons to the nazis and the french at the same time."

That, sir, is the very definition of neutrality. They sold munitions to both sides, not taking a stand for either ideology. I can tell English isn't your first language, so I'm willing to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you just omitted the word "not" between is and neutral. But it not, I have to question what you believe neutrality means.

[TallDave]

Stalin and Hitler both had their plans for Switzerland.

So does bin Laden.

[DWH]

The only thing I fear with this plan is that eventually the US military will get bored and bomb some place so well it looks like a natural disaster;then they would deploy the military to go "help".There is always a loophole in even the best intentioned plan.
What we really need to do is bring all our military home and wait for the next natural disaster, then when they cry for our help, ask one simple question,"What's in it for the USA?"

[Olli Lindholm]

Ps Ps: did you notice that almoust every body that wrote about the soviets were not from america.

Funny thing. but please correct this outjustice that you have made.

Im warning you

Olli Lindholm

[Olli Lindholm]

I don't know if anybody has said this before (for i'm so lasy and don't have time to read every comment) but the collapse of soviet union had nothing to do with reagan nor earthquaces.

You americans are so pjuny minded. THe collapse os Soviet Union was because Gorbachev gave too much in from the anti communism patrties.

He tried a new policy at leading Sovies and it failed.
Only thing that reagan did was that he happend to be president og usa at the time and was lucky.

When Gorbachev had given all the freadoms and autonomies to soviet states (wich was part of the policy decided before the earthquakes) the konservativ part of communism parrty tried to take ower and the people of sovies rebelled because Jeltsin was a good speaker.

after this Gorbachev made russia leave soviet union for revenge.

soviet union had more wealth than you realise.
Ofcurse you can't realice this because of propaganda movies that have brainwashed your mind.

The could have easily continue the weapon thingy for yers and yers but Gorbachev was too in giving.

My point is that I'm sick of you americans taking credit of the fall of soviet union.
That credit goes to Jeltsin and his rebellion.

I personaly think that communism is only sensible policy in the world. too bad it doesn't work.

Im from finland so I know this thing without propaganda and I demand that you scott correct this mistake you made.

The world is already pissed off by your countrys blody anoying habit of taking all the credit.

Dont make us kill you.

Othervice good idea that switseland strategy.

sencearly
Olli Lindholm

ps: Correct ore be exterminated

[Bill]

>Americans would not want to fund direct foreign aid to unpopular nations,

That hasn't stopped the US government from funding every dictator from Stalin to Pol Pot.

Americans can "want" whatever they want... but as long as the Federal Reserve can print money and hand it to banks that "lend" money to the dictators, all the bad regimes on the planet are funded directly by us.

[Not bad]

I genuinely like that plan Scott, and think it would work. However, I think that it would also work if we just left it at the "stop pissing other countries off" stage. Left to their own devices, even the most extreme Muslims will not fly halfway around to world to carry out suicide attacks against infidels that have been minding their own business. I don't care what their holy book says, humans are just lazier than that.

Your idea takes it a step further, which is fine. I also like the idea of simply focusing on making our country a wonderful, wealthy and educated place to live while maintaining our freedoms. The "beacon" approach to changing the world.

[Noah Vaile]

One reason it is impractical as a peace plan is because if it worked at all, it would be working right now and would have been working 9-11-2001. WE ARE the go to nation in times of disaster every- and any- where in the world. We are the world's hospital creating drugs for diseases and treating people from all over the world who come here for treatment.

The problem is that the terrorists don't care. They don't want anything from us but our lives. They don't want our wealth, health or love- just our lives. They don't hate us for what we have but because we are.

This seems counter intuitive- every body can be bribed, right? Everyone has his price, yes? Well, in the case of the islamofascists (who apparently include over 200,000 of our own muslim citizens) the answer is quite simply -NO-!

They do not want us in Ieaq because that is where they live. They want to attack us in the United States, our home, so they can get the frequent flyer miles. And of course here they can kill more of us because 1) here we all are and 2) we civilians do not shoot back.

As for cross training our soldiers as disaster/relief workers. Are you nuts?

And for those idiots on this board/blog who decry the disaster help provided here at home and abroad: You seem to think that disaster aid means staying forever and doing everything. You equate complaints about Katrina with reality and you are wrong wrong wrong. You equate aid with rebuilding and even repopulating. Aid is aid- those beggars wanted welfare.

[Toby]

Actually, no, they don't.

http://www.speroforum.com/site/article.asp?id=9661

Children's hospital no less… less than a week ago.

[Alexandre]

It wouldn't work because United States citizens are to scared of the people from other nations. You would have to add to your plan exchange programs for students to visit other countries and a school program which makes students learn new languages. You can't become friends from a day to another because you helped a country, your people will go in the helped country and think that every ressources they got is theirs of a taking.

I'm from Canada and I just keep being surprised every time I visit your country. The majority of your population is as proud of being from the United States as they lack knowledge about the rest of the world. Every day I learn of some war or terrorist group that got, at some point in recent history, trained and armed by the CIA.

[marketdoctor]

This is a good idea. Sure, our relief efforts for Katrina weren't our finest hour, but remember, that was our OWN country. We're still good at helping out OTHER people.

As for the game theory of it, our PR value is low enough that we're a LONG way from being seen as "always nice."

[The Writer Formerly Known as CC]

It'll never work..

Canada is primarily known for its peacekeeping role. We send aid and supplies to disaster areas all the time, we have an elite emergency team to deal with these problems, we took in more refugees than the States and yet, we still arrested 17 people who wanted to blow up Toronto and behead the Prime Minister on Parliament Hill...

You have to accept that no amount of good you do will change the fact that you are an infidel who deserves to be killed. End of story.

[Aussie]

Scott, it's not that your plan is impractical....it's just too late. Earlier posts likened the situation to that of the schoolyard bully suddenly giving you money to buy your lunch. I can't help but agree. The US has stomped and trampled its way over much of the planet for its various claimed causes for far too many decades to undo the hurt within any of the near future generations. From dodgy arms deals to oil greed (and everything in between), the US has pretty well been the front runner. I like your model but it's going to take generations of action to undo that of the past. Ummm, call me pessimistic but how much oil does the US produce itself and how much does it consume? Your government is just looking after you aren’t they? Will they stop looking after you anytime soon?

[naz]

The clever people who know so much about Swiss banking probably haven't a penny to their name. "Secrecy code" indeed!

[naz]

Terrorists don't bomb hospitals? Well, maybe not the everyday sort. But the U.S. sure manages to ensure that a couple of Tomahawks "stray" into targets with large civilian casualties ensuing.

[Carmelo Lisciotto]

A lot of varying opinions... I can see logic in them all

Carmelo Lisciotto

[Francesco Orsenigo]

"Think of it this way: Who attacks a hospital?"
US destroyed a pharmaceutical plant in Sudan.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Al-Shifa_pharmaceutical_factory
Does it count?

Anyway, the idea of turning from a terrorist state to a "friend" state is great, I would have wanted something similar for Italy.

Training soldiers for civilian duties (masonry, mine removal, teaching, emergency life-support manoveurs, whatever!) would be great, also because you are actually training YOUR OWN PEOPLE to do very useful things.

In my opinion, the best point of the idea is that if you help other to live better and be in lesser misery, there will be less anger and less fuel for terror.
Happy people are less willing to die attempting to kill you.
They have more to lose.

I'm sorry, I can't find any drawbacks.

[Carmelo Lisciotto]

A lot of varying opinions... I can see logic in them all

Carmelo Lisciotto

[Phil]

Let's face it, after Katrina no ones can believe the US as the centre of Diaster Recovery!

[Steffen]

If one attacks Switzerland he will soon have MANY enemies because most rich people have their money secured there. The idea of the US as desaster relief cooperator is very promising but the way you dealt with Kathrina some years back gives doubts concerning your capabilities as helpers, sorry to say so.

In my opinion the only way to relieve tensions is to reduce the amount of prejudice between countries, religions, people as such. But this is like wishing to end world's wars by giving each soldier (including the generals) and demanding that they shake hands and stop this idiocity...

[LinkCanabico]

Hi has someone else noticed thath many coments say somthing along the lines "yes lets stop being the bully lets make it the mafias way and recive favors for being frendly" and now you ask why most countrys hate the USA.

There is an old mexican saying (182*) "tan lejos de dios y tan cerca de los gringos" (to far from god and to close to the americans) this was before any middle east problems or anything similar, face it americans are the legacy of religus radicals.

The american way has always been, kill eweryone if someone asks it was because they wher ____________ (incert exuse here, ej terrorists, comunists, opresors, savages, indians, buffalos, wiches, blacks, females, mexicans, nazis, and a realy long ETC...). as a country you are a ignorant and BIG mob.

And thoes how think Switzerland is neutral i have some news for you they soled wapons to the nazis and the french at the same time.

The plan would not work because you are americans and always will be .

[Azi]

"No good deed goes unpunished"
- [No Idea]

Scott, you're a wealthy man. How many of your friends have you actually helped out when they've needed it? How many of those didn't end up feeling resentful? When you help a proud person they feel bad, no matter how desperately they needed the help. I think this result scales up well to entire countries.

Africa is full of countries that hate the west inspite of (I would argue Because Of) all the aid that has been pumped into it over the last several decades. Sure, you can argue (and it's a hard argument to win convincingly) that the west caused the poverty, but the America today is not the same as the America that caused it. It's like blaming the son for what the father did.

So sure, become the international firemen. You'll probably have more peace, but I seriously doubt it'll get you any more respect, love and harmony with your neighbours.

[Harry]

The reason that nobody attacks Switzerland is because politicians do not want to see all their money from their secret, numbered, bank account piled up in the street next to a member of the Swiss guard and a box of matches.

[Mark James Bowness]

"We need to be more known as the country that finds people under rubble, as opposed to our current plan of being known as the people who put people there in the first place."

Really good message.

Mark Bowness

[Kevin Kunreuther]

The following comment was posted to previous blogpost by me in error. Here is where it belongs

Okay, here's something I find very interesting. If a Democrat suggests your plan, it's considered ultraliberalistic, impractical, pie in the sky, expensive and anti-American. If a Republican suggests this idea, it's considered humane, pragmatic, compassionate, a sound investment and American as the Fourth Of July. I recommend suggesting this idea to Fred Thompson, he'll sound like a real compassionate conservative and he's an actor so he'll know how to sell it.

[Shachar Shemesh]

I'll spell out the catch in your logic. Another commenter already pointed it out. The catch is, it doesn't work.

Israel has what is, in all likelihood, the best rescue team in the world. It offers it, as a matter of routine, to any country that is hit by any natural disaster that requires search and rescue. It helped Turkey when it was hit by an earth quake. It helped Sri-Lanka when it was hit by a tsunami. It even offered to help San Francisco when it was hit by an earth quake (an offer that was declined, memory serving me right).

The search&rescue team is a highly specialized team. It has dogs trained to listen to breathing under rubble. It has special cranes designed to pick up whole parts of collapsed buildings, and operators skilled in operating them without having the rest of the building collapse further.

There are two things that need to be understood about this capability, however. The first is that it is part of the IDF, the Israeli military. The second is that it is a unit that needs to be exercised in order to be kept in shape.

The two facts are, in fact, linked. The team is part of the IDF because, as part of a war scenario, rescue from collapsed buildings is one of the capabilities that an army needs. This explains why a war stricken country is the one to develop this capability, and how it keeps it exercised :-(

As for the offered help bridging wars, when an earth quake hit Iran, and Israel offered its help, Iran declined. Unlike the US refusal, which was based on the assumption (true or false, it doesn't matter) that the US can help itself, that was not the basis of refusal by Iran (it did accept help from other countries). It refused help precisely BECAUSE accepting it would mean a conflict between the country's desire to keep Israel in the "enemy" list.

Shachar

[jerry w.]

I submitted this earlier today:

"You're missing the financial double ended bonus this could present us. With ongoing advances in weather control, we could contract with, for example, China to create a tsunami in Japan to get back for WWII stuff. Then, we collect from Japan to prevent it from happening, a win win deal if there ever was one."

I didn't realize that I missed the real several layer multiple winner! We would then divert the tsunami from Japan as described, and instead have it go to their enemies, South Korea. South Korea would then pay us to have it whack into North Korea and we collect for that, and then get the credit for helping North Korea recover.

Too cool.....

http://boskolives.wordpress.com/

[Muthu Ramadoss]

Scott Adams for President!

You'll win if the rest of the world can participate in your elections ;)

[Ian]

Has to work. Good for world peace, good for big business, good for voters' feel good factor (as long as the funds don't go to those ones you don't like.)

Funniest thing of all, speaking as an agnostic: it's the most Christian-sounding idea to come out of the world's most fundamentalist Christian society for a long time.

Why is it that most born-agains see the whole "forgiveness", "respond with love" and "love everyone" stuff applying only to them and the people they like? For everyone else, they suddenly get all Old Testament.

[noel]

scott, that plan would be super .. the US just has to be sincere in implementing the plan .. ive been thinkin of a similar plan myself for years, but since i'm a teacher, my thoughts ran on a different track :

1. poverty has always been a cause of desperate ideas
2. poverty in a nation, and affluence in another .. can get people in the poor nation to resent the other nation's success, and to think desperate ideas ..

so far, so bad. an analysis of the behaviour of the poor, even the poor in rich countries like the States, in relation to what their rich neighbors have, will point to that. the ideal is that the poor get inspiration from the rich, but reality does not always follow the ideal ..

3. so here's my plan .. the rich nations can help the poor nations help themselves .. by way of jobs and education [ practical, economic, cross-cultural ]

it is very long term, but it can work ..

your plan is good, when you say it, it's funny, but it should prove good. actually, anything that makes nations friends should prove great

noel
gmatcrew@yahoo.com

[Sam Thornton]

For a while I thought that maybe if we quit shooting people and blowing their stuff up it would be easier to hock their stuff when we stole it since it would be in fewer pieces. Now I'm not so sure, even if we stole their stuff while "helping" them, a good opportunity to misdirect their attention.

I think maybe the best plan is to buy a lot of their stuff with money we print off, then concentrate on stealing back the money. Kind of like we do with NAFTA. That seems to be working out OK.

[D. Mented]

Two words:
"cognitive dissonance"
You need to see the volume and intensity of anti-american propaganda to understand that there are many countries that have recieved the benefits of American disaster relief (which seems to work better overseas than it does here, although that could be the reporting) and yet the citizens of these countries still weep with joy when they see on the news that Americans have been killed. (saw this in an interview with a woman who was weeping, and explained "I'm just so happy that Americans have been killed!")
There have been surveys that showed that Muslims feel it is both immoral and religiously forbidden to kill other Muslims, and yet some of these people go out and bomb markets full of their fellow Muslims.
If they can manage to think of that as a holy act, don't expect them to have problems with hating America even while recieving disaster aid.
No, I'm not prejudiced against Muslims. I see every population as equally overburdened with idiots. There have been some pretty big examples of Muslims in states of cognitive dissonance lately, so they're handy references.
Too bad being nice to people doesn't make them calm down and stop hitting you. It would be a better world. In fact, If I believed in a creator God, I'd have to believe he either created us this way on purpose, or made a mistake, and is therefore proven fallible.
D.Mented

[Ray Kremer]

Why it's impractical? Easy. We'd have to wait for natural disasters to hit the countries that are filled with people who want to come here and set off bombs before it would be effective.

[Benny]

"Who attacks a hospital? Even terrorists avoid that sort of target". Scott may be right, terrorists don't often attack hospitals, but Muslim terrorists attack elementary schools, public transportion, weddings, shopping malls, crowded theaters, etc.

The USA gives away money with no strings attached for AIDS drugs and prevention and does not enforce patents on drugs USA companies develop. The USA gave away money and naval resources to Thailand after the tsunami while Thais partied on. The USA supports 12 million economic refugees (central american illegal immigrants), and freely admits as many as can walk and swim in. USA military kept the peace in Europe for 40 years after WWII and still acts as a tripwire in Korea. The USA supports 25% or more of the budget of the corrupt and inept UN. USA citizens privately give away millions of dollars to foreign charity. The USA gives enough away. At least the rest of the world shold say "thank you" while they hold out their greedy hands.

[Maggie]

I don't think it's impractical. I do think the USA has dug itself into such a huge motherfucker of a hole that the rest of the world may be a touch cynical about such plans, not to mention that the circus that passes for government would never agree - you can find excuses for anything if you try hard enough.

So if anybody actually wanted to do it, it would be a damn good idea.

[Joe Melnick]

Here's a timely story:

All throughout the North West Frontier Province (NWFP), Pakistan's impoverished western border with Afghanistan, lie the ruins of barbershops and music and video stores – symbols of Western-oriented life that religious extremists have destroyed in a growing wave of violence.

Now Islamist militants have a new target, and if they are successful, observers say their campaign could be disastrous for Pakistan's future.

In what appears to be an escalating spree over the last year, extremists have bombed at least four girls' schools and circulated violent threats warning girls to stay at home.

[swio]

Sounds great, but maybe America should start with New Orleans.

I doubt it would be politically possible to direct enough funds to being the world disaster recovery experts for America to be very good at it. To get anything funded in American government you have to get congress to approve it. This works great for things like the military because representatives can direct alot of that funding to their own districts. I can't see how you could do the same with overseas aid funding.

On top of this I think Americans are just too American focusesd to really understand other countries enough to provide effective help. In the Baghdad embassy today, out of 1000 staff there are 33 arabic speakers. If losing 3000+ soldiers in a war does not encourage someone to learn the local language I can't see how the First American Earthquake Disaster Relief Division is going to be effective when it turns up in Middleofnowheristan where they speak WtfRtheysaying.

"America becomes the disaster recovery center of the world. To some extent, we already are."

That's less true than most Americans think. Americans are on the scene at pretty much any major disaster, but like all western nations they don't hang around very long.

A great example is the major earthquake in Pakistan in 2005. Western countries showed up, did a bit of disaster relief and then went home. Even two years after the earthquake there were tens of thousands of families that were still homeless and living in tents. And living in tents in a Pakistani winter without water or food is no picnic. But you know who else showed up to help when the earthquake hit? The jihadi islamic groups. And its sad to say but in the opinion of the locals they did a pretty good job. They did not have as much resources but it was easier for them to be effective because they were locals. They spoke the language. And the big differecenc is that they're still there today helping out and by doing so winning over support to their cause long after western governments left.

You seem to think that the reason America is unliked is that America is not doing enough in the world. I think you got it the wrong way around. The American governmnt is doing plenty, its just that its not making anybody like you more. Perhaps you should could read "Confessions of an Economic Hit Man" by John Perkins to get an idea of the things that America could stop doing. There's a reason South America is going anti-american and its got nothing to do with earthquakes.

[zardoz]

Scott Adams for President.

[Billy B]

It has some merit. If I ran the world I would rule that all countries helped others in times of need. We are one family of mankind.

I'm not sure how inclined I would be to help stupid people though, like those that live in New Orleans that choose to live where they shouldn't be living and always expecting others to bail them out.
Billy B

[Rich]

This plan might work if God could be taken out of the equation. God types wouldn't care about our aid because the disaster is His work.

See. It's all God's fault. This is ironic, considering that God is an imaginary being.

[stevie]

I think we should be more like Canada when it come to foreign policy. mind our own business.

[Eric Garland]

Uh, Scott, you've just reached the same conclusion as the Pentagon. Globalization is making state-to-state warfare pointless and inconvenient, but the US Military's logistical capabilities are peerless in the world. The way to peace may be through using the military infrastructure to bring the world bags of rice and clean water instead of bombs.

It was seem hyper liberal, but there are otherwise bellicose defense planners who have recently reached your conclusion. Hint, though: they are not at the American Enterprise Institute.

[Bryan]

"This plan is impractical of course, as are all of my peace plans."

Your sentence is one word too long. Take out the word "peace".

[Ewan MacKenzie]

As others have pointed out, the USA already does a great deal of what you suggest. The problem is that it spends thousands or millions times more on bombing and invading and generally interfering in other countries, and doing so with a callous indifference to the life of anyone who is not an American.

Your plan is a good one, but it can be summarised as: be less of an arrogant bully.

The rest of us had already sussed that out.

[tc]

Won't work because the world works like this: if you are my enemy, and you are his friend, you automatically become my enemy by association. That is, if the US helps Israel, Palistine will treat both as its enemy. You can't be both neutral and assist in world conflict.

[pete]

"We need to be more known as the country that finds people under rubble, as opposed to our current plan of being known as the people who put people there in the first place."

well done scott!

[Padre]

I like the idea, but like you said it may be impractical. The reason that Switzerland is not attacked is because they pose no reasonable threat to any terror or religious groups. It is by not getting involved and staying out of the way that helps. Not to mention having great banks. And what did they do with the Nazis? Nothing just let them do what ever as long as they're paying the bills. Don't get me wrong I don't have anything against the Swiss, I just think that we have to much past aggresion to play peace now.

I say stick with what works. Start bombing and don't stop till everyone is on their knees with their money in our wallets! May not be practical either, but it is alot more fun! :)

[Chris]

I'm sure I used to be able to read some sensible comments on this blog - but no longer, it seems.

The idea that Switzerland isn't invaded because of easy to destroy bridges and the male population having access to guns is insane. It does explain the high suicide rate though. This seems like the sort of theory that can only exist in the head of some paranoid Americans who believe the rest of the world is just trying to invade each other.

Also, slapping USA on all the aid the US gives out... well, that's already done, and one of the reasons US aid is often frowned upon by the outside world is that it's used as an excuse to shift US produce and to channel money to US companies. Most NGOs will try to use local produce and organisations to provide aid.

So, making aid actually aid and not just a hidden subsidy to US companies might be a good start.

[61north]

So you don't think terrorists would attack either Switzerland or anyone doing relief work?

Remember the attack on the Red Cross office in Baghdad?

http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/meast/10/27/sprj.irq.main/index.html

The ICRC is the SWISS organization that leads the world in humanitarian relief. Got blown up by savages with a warped religious death wish.

Your idea is ridiculous in so many ways.

Stick to the office comic strips, Scott.

[BOSSY]

You forgot the part about: Switzerland is Mr. Moneybags whereas the U.S. is a whore.

[robert]

Check out this site. It's a much better plan that involves very little cash outlay:

http://www.imao.us/docs/NukeTheMoon.htm

[John Keitz]

It wouldn't work for us. It workd for the Swiss because there is no reason to attack Switzerland. What has Switzerland ever created beyond Martin Gerber and a couple of banks? Come on!

[Erik]

"Historians say it was Reagan’s military build-up that caused the Soviet Union to see the futility of the Cold War."? We never learned that, at high school level(I think our school level translates to that. I'm 18, anyways, that level of education) in Norway.

Basicly, what I remember(as a pretty average student) is the Sovjet union getting more and more foreign-friendly leaders, and then starting more and more open and nice policies. Then the policies failed(crop policy ruined the land, etc) and the Sovjet union fell apart.

Funny how stories are different. Too bad yours is probably going to outlive mine.

Your plan is at least nicer than others. Why it wouldn't work? I dunno.. People won't change their view of the USA no matter what, maybe?

[Florin]

Well, in my eyes, the answer to your problem is simple. The plan is impractical because this country is run by the American equivalent of Afgan Warlords. The Cheneys of this world thrive on war, so they got to have it...

That's why it's impractical.

If we had a "competent" president (or a woman) your plan would be perfectly fine.

[Paul Mckenna]

Ever been to Switzerland ?
Its full of arseholes. Go there, find out.

Who attacks hospitals ?
America.
Grenada invasion.
"They had armed the lunatic patients."

Wankers

[Paul Mckenna]

Ever been to Switzerland ?
Its full of arseholes. Go there, find out.

Who attacks hospitals ?
America.
Grenada invasion.
"They had armed the lunatic patients."

Wankers

[Bill]

That sounds a bit like "International Rescue."

Thunderbirds are Go!

[Mercutio2000]

Please read the link:

http://history-switzerland.geschichte-schweiz.ch/switzerland-second-world-war-ii.html

Especially focus on the area where it asks in large letters "Why did Hitler not attack Switzerland?" The Swiss had much in the way of deterrent that Germany didn't have time or resources to defeat at the time. Hitler planned to get Switzerland on the way back from conquering much of the world.

Neutrality only works until all your allies are gone.

[Mercutio2000]

Please read the link:

http://history-switzerland.geschichte-schweiz.ch/switzerland-second-world-war-ii.html

Especially focus on the area where it asks in large letters "Why did Hitler not attack Switzerland?" The Swiss had much in the way of deterrent that Germany didn't have time or resources to take. Hitler planned to get Switzerland on the way back from conquering much of the world.

Neutrality only works until all your allies are gone.

[Mercutio2000]

Please read the link:

http://history-switzerland.geschichte-schweiz.ch/switzerland-second-world-war-ii.html

Especially focus on the area where it asks in large letters "Why did Hitler not attack Switzerland?" The Swiss had much in the way of deterrent that Germany didn't have time or resources to take. Hitler planned to get Switzerland on the way back from conquering much of the world.

Neutrality only works until all your allies are gone.

[K]

Dear Scott. You need to read more news. No country in their right mind would trust us to do disaster recovery. We can't even it do it in our own country.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,277053,00.html

[asm826]

The Swiss were left alone because they armed every male citizen with a combat rifle and load of ammo that they take home and keep ready. Every citizen is a member of the reserves. Even the Nazis didn't want to fight a trained, well armed force in the mountains.

[Silvox]

Who'd be so stupid to paint a big white circle on their head with a red cross on it?
Also the empire that cause the savior back to his father in the best selling historic book, now have a smallest country in the world located in them.
For switzerland, they speak deutsche and deutsche, depends on location.

[SirDrinksalot]

Switzerland has avoided war not just by claiming neutrality. It's a combination of not threatening anyone, having their country in mountainous terrian that would be quite difficult to invade, and having everyone in the country serve 2 years in the military, after which they get to take their rifle home with them. There really isn't much advantage to attacking a country that isn't threatening you and whose entire population is armed and has military training, and can go up into the mountains and never be dislodged.

[Will Von Wizzlepig]

"If evil were a lesser breed than justice, after all these years the righteous would have freed the world from sin."
-OK GO lyric

As long as evil bastards like Cheney and Rove are running our country, as long as people are educated by their television sets and tolerate/love these evil bastards, we will continue to need someone to hate and kill. If these people to hate don't exist (pre-Iraq), then we will assuredly go and create them (post-Iraq). And if we don't hate them, we'd better generate a reason to.

See also: "The Project for a New American Century", an organization I'd love to hear Scott's opinion of.

Peace and harmony, health and longevity, tolerance and understanding... they are all bad for profits.

[notralph]

Wilson: How, exactly, would the "we're too incompetent to do anything well country" be rated as one of the best places in the world to live? Maybe it's just a lucky accident that we have an internation reputation for tolerance, acceptance, multiculturality and peacekeeping.

Not to mention we're pretty damn good at providing you (if you are from the USA) with clean, potable water and lumber. As a side bonus, we mine the finest quality diamonds in the world. And those are all just for starters.

Don't be a jerk.

[Kerry Neighbour]

Unfortunately, the USA is full of fundamentalist Christians. There is not much you can do with those sorts of people. They do evil things like send missionaries all over the place.

If you want to be like Switzerland, then you need to become a bit more like Switzerland. Become educated, for example. The USA is known around the World (rightly or wrongly) for being full of uneducated, insular bigots. I think that if you became a lot more secular, then you would be more liked.

[Incredipete]

I kind of enjoyed Clinton's policy of bombing the Chinese Embassy.

Well, I guess that wasn't exactly a "policy" per se, but it was highly entertaining, and if I were in charge, I'd make it our official policy.

The best way we can help the world is by bringing our military here, developing alternative renewable energy sources, and ceasing trade with the rest of the world. I have a feeling that the rest of the world would miss us a whole lot more than they care to admit.

[Ken H.]

That's Canada's current plan, dammit!

Except the insurance part. That would take a scheming capitalist overindulged American to think of. We'll just spend ourselves poor.

[Mike]

I suspect this will only work if the U.S. invents a device that can create natural disasters locationally-accurate and on-demand. Then we can still kill people while pretending to care.

[tenassian]

As everyone as pointed out, America DOES give huge amounts to disaster relief around the world. "They" don't share the same value systems.

I have to agree with the poster who says the real reason no one attacks Switzerland is that they keep all the ill-gotten gains of various states around the world.

However:
"To you Canadians that think you're the 'nice-guy' country... you're not! You're the "we're too incompetent to do anything really worthwhile" country. Anyone that's been to Canada, or knows people from Canada knows this."

... Uh, not the Canadian's I know, but then there are just as many incompetent American's out there, if the debacle in Iraq is any indication. Last I heard the Canadian Regiment in Afghanistan was holding their own. Under-funded? Sure. Incompetent? I just don't see any basis for that remark.

Maybe that guy's Canadian girlfriend dumped him, or something.

[Danimal]

You're loosly describing a concept called the "SysAdmin" force proposed by some in the Pentagon and the Department of Defense. A previous post mentioned Tom Barnett, the author of The Pentagon's New Map and Blueprint for Action: A Future Worth Creating. If you want to get smart on the issue, those are great books to read.

http://www.d-n-i.net/dni_reviews/pentagon_map.htm

(P.S. Good work on the Global Warming blogs)

[Brad Hutchings]

I have a better plan. How about if America makes all of the movies, most of the music, and all of the software? I bet that would work.

[Triox]

Er, sorry just got off of work and first website that I read, but I cant be bothered to read through all the comments so this may already have been mentioned...

Did you see the good ol' U.S. of A's "disaster aid" when New Orleans needed it? And these where people in your own country, why would any country accept that kind of aid when it is worth less than spit?

It's a good plan in theory, but your governments incompetance has already doomed it to fail...

[Canadian Cousin]

The one biggest mistake that most people make is to expect "Terrorist" nations (noticed how I didn't say muslims) to be anywhere near what you and I would call rational.

[Triox]

Er, sorry just got off of work and first website that I read, but I cant be bothered to read through all the comments so this may already have been mentioned...

Did you see the good ol' U.S. of A's "disaster aid" when New Orleans needed it? And these where people in your own country, why would any country accept that kind of aid when it is worth less than spit?

It's a good plan in theory, but your governments incompetance has already doomed it to fail...

[@Rob]

So we would become "American Insurance LLC"? Decent plan but when the earthquke hits in Iran and we go to help them, because they signed an agreement with us, but then they refuse to let us in...those a-hole muslims would try that. Then what? Credibility gone - egg on us - muslims laugh or that yelping thing... Lesson? Never trust a muslim...ever!

[Joe Melnick]

Wow, yet another faulty premise. You really need to think these through a bit more before posting. Terrorists not only target hospitals, churches, mosques, buses, cafes, markets and innocents everywhere, they execute teachers in front of their students. A month or so ago they found a school in Iraq that had been built with explosives in the walls and wires leading outside, just waiting for the girls to arrive before blowing everyone up.

I know, let's reason with them! Show them how swell we are and they'll drop the jihad like a bad habit.

Never mind that the US is already the most generous with aid, financial and otherwise. Al qaeda pays for a couple of daycare centers and they're the new Mother Theresas. The US is the first and pretty much only responder to every disaster site in the world and have liberated scores of millions of muslims, yet they're Satan. Go figure.

Katrina was a locally-managed disaster of the mayor and governor, and even without asking for help as required, the navy sent in teams of medics within 24 hours from an offshore ship. They have to ask the president for help and they didn't. He's not allowed to send the National Guard wherever he likes, you know.

[Stomper]

Muttley:

Regardless of where the suicide bombers are being recruited, terrorism still has its roots in poverty, despair and resentment. That doesn't mean we can solve terrorism by opening our wallets, and I do not recommend that we simply throw money at the problems of others. However, being the biggest bully on the block certainly isn't working for us.

--Stomper

[Kilgor]

Relief workers are attacked all of the time all around the world ; hell, even in our own country (see the Katrina cleanup effort).

[God]

Child, I am delighted you have finally picked up on this rather ingenious suggestion of mine to turn the other cheek.
Countries which send out the vibration of fear and aggression always experience reasons to be fearful and aggressive. Countries which send out the vibration of trust and peace always experience reasons to trust and be peaceful.
The universe you live in is set up in precisely this way - that man gets to experience whatever he focuses on. If a man wants aggression against him to stop, he only has to stop anticipating aggression and the universe will obey his very thought by ceasing to send aggression to his door.
The universe is a mirror, you see. Impersonal and reflective. It will reflect back to you whatever you send out. So turn the other cheek. Be peaceful, and my cosmic mirror has no choice but to reflect peace back to you whether you are a man, a country, a league of nations or a planet.
This has always been the answer you have looked for. I congratulate you for having finally found it.

[David Kimball]

What you're describing is the work of the United Nations. Oh, not the work of the General Assembly and the Security Council, but rather the work of the UN Agencies like UNICEF, UNESCO, WHO, etc. These agencies work in collaboration with the 25,000 NGO's around the world to do good. For instance, when the Tsunami hit, the UN coordinated the efforts of over 250 NGO (Non-Government Organizations) to provide relief. Global solutions to Global problems can't come from a country operating within a paradigm of competition and control. Those solutions can only come from collaboration and cooperation.

[car free since '93]

To those who think the plan won't work because "they" are too bloodthirsty, "they" are too barbaric, "they" are too evil, "they" kill the innocent, "they" are cowards, "they" have been brainwashed... do I have to say more? Look in the mirror!

I think the plan won't work because "they" don't trust us. And for good reason. It will take a lot of years for us to regain any credibility in the world.

CFS '93

[Dave]

It seems like we already are pretty good at avoiding being attacked. Other than during the war of 1812, we have only been attacked once (Pearl Harbor) by another country. All we have to do is stop attacking other people, and then we'll be all set.

[Fred Nurke]

Canada is "too incompetent to do anything really worthwhile"?

Think about that next time you do up your zipper, take an insulin shot, need your embassy staff spirited away from Iranian hostage takers, need a place to put your planes and people because you've closed down your airports after a terrorist attack, or need a strong willing partner to help clean up the mess in Afghanistan.

Where our incompetence shines is in continuing to help unappreciative neighbours.

See, in reality, I know that's not true. Besides which, we actually like Americans. Not all of you of course, you "Wilson" are a complete shit. But the rest of you, especially the majority of you who voted not to put Bush into the White House, we like. We cheer for you as neighbours and cousins, in the Olympics or in Hockey, as long as we're out of course. We own recreational property down there, and say "hi neighbour" to those of you who own recreational property up here. We shop there, you shop here. We talk, trade and help each other as neighbours should.

So, next month when you're celebrating July 4th, and we've just celebrated July 1st, we'll wave at each other across the fence as we have done for years and say "hi neighbour, need anything?"

[Karl]

We'd have to get a lot better at disaster relief for this to have any hope of working.

Two years after Katrina, New Orleans is still in terrible shape ... what country wants that kind of help?

[D]

alan wrote:

1. through diplomatic back channels, and face-face meetings convince China that if they move against Taiwan we will NOT defend taiwan. If they act now we will instead make a HUGE fuss about it, but never defend them.

2. China takes over taiwan, we announce that we will defend taiwan, and declare war.

-----

You do realize that this is exactly what happened with Iraq and Kuwait in the Gulf War, right?

The U.S. ambassador told Saddam Hussein that the we had "no opinion" on Iraq invading Kuwait before the invasion, and then went in and "liberated" Kuwait afterwards.

Wikipedia is hardly a reliable source, but you can check their references:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gulf_War#Eve_of_the_invasion

[the_brett]

Oh, sorry...another point about not targeting hospitals. The new terror strategy is to shoot down a helicopter and then specifically target the rescuers. But, hospitals are safe...not buying it.

[Samuel Sutter]

that sounds strangely like the politics that Jesus talks about - all that loving your enemy stuff.

[the_brett]

I can't read all of the comments, so I hope I'm late in saying this, but I'm so disappointed in some of the early comments, but more so in your post, Scott.

First, Switzerland's neutrality is bought and paid for. No one can attack Switzerland because that would be the end of their economy. Even terrorists need Switzerland. Second, why would you ever assume that terrorists don't bomb hospitals???? They shoot school children in the back!! That's just a ridiculous assumption.

Finally, and most importantly, (and you already touched on this a bit, Scott) we are already the "go-to" country when a crisis occurs. We ALWAYS offer help...even to Iran, remember, and it is (almost) always accepted, with no thanks, I might add. The only thing we ever get out of it is that the recipients of our good fortune sometimes claim that we caused the earthquake in the first place.

We have an obligation as human beings to help anyone in need. But let's not delude ourselves into thinking we would actually be appreciated for it. The idea of any kind of "peace" plan is laughable. How can you have peace when only one side wants it. That peace plan with Hitler really worked out splendidly, didn't it? Face it, some people want peace, and some people want those people to want peace.

[j_c]

Heeeellooooo..... Canada is already known as the "mop up" country. We're kind of like the U.S.'s drinking buddy, who goes around apologizing for our friend's bufoonish behavior and tidies up the room while offering to replace the coffee table...

which would also explain our patronizing behaviour toward American policy and attitudes. But hey, as the person who has to clean up all the post-binge vomit, can you blame us for mocking you?

It's a complicated friendship....

[Sean]

Re: Wilson's comment

"To you Canadians that think you're the 'nice-guy' country... you're not! You're the "we're too incompetent to do anything really worthwhile" country. Anyone that's been to Canada, or knows people from Canada knows this."

Just a few things that you may have heard of, or used that were invented in Canada...

Insulin, Treatment for Diabetes [1921, Frederick Banting, Charles Best]
Telephone [1876, Alexander Graham Bell]
Light Bulb [1874, Henry Woodward, Mathew Evans]
Five Pin Bowling [1908, Thomas F. Ryan]
Wonderbra [1964, Louise Poirier]
Pacemaker [1950, John Hopps, Wilfred Bigelow, John Callaghan]
Robertson Screw, 1908 [Peter Robertson]
Zipper [1913, Gideon Sundback]
Electric Wheelchair [1952, George Klein]
Poutine [1957, Fernand Lachance]
Cobalt-60 “Bomb” Cancer Treatment [1951, Harold Johns]
Java Programming Language [1994, James Arthur Gosling]
Bloody Caesar [1969, Walter Chell]
Canadarm [1975, Spar Aerospace/NRC]
Standard time [1878, Sir Sandford Fleming]
Electron Microscope [1939, James Hillier, Albert Prebus]
Ski-Doo [1922, Armand Bombardier]
BlackBerry [1999, Mike Lazaridis]
Radio Voice Transmission [1900, Reginald Fessenden]
Birchbark Canoe [First Peoples]
Basketball [1892, James Naismith]
Retractable Beer Carton Handle [1957, Steve Pasjack]
UV Degradable Plastics [1971, James Guillet]
Instant Replay [1955, CBC’s Hockey Night in Canada]
Goalie Mask [1959, Jacques Plante]
Marquis Wheat [1908, Sir Charles Saunders]
Pablum [1930, Alan Brown, Theodore Drake, Frederick Tisdall]
Lacrosse [First Peoples]
Electric Oven [1892, Thomas Ahearn]
Steam Fog Horn [1853, Robert Foulis]
Walkie-Talkie [1942, Donald L. Hings]
Alkaline Long-Lasting Battery [1959, Lewis Urry]
Paint roller [1940, Norman Breakey]
Electronic Music Synthesizer [1945, Hugh Le Caine]
WeeVac 6 [1990, Wendy Murphy]
Green Garbage Bag [1950, Harry Wasylyk, Larry Hansen, Frank Plomp]
Snowblower [1925, Arthur Sicard]
Self-propelled Combine Harvester [1937, Thomas Carroll]
Instant Mashed Potatoes [1962, Edward Asselbergs]
Explosives Vapour Detector [1985, Lorne Elias]
Marine Screw Propeller [1833, John Patch]
Plexiglas [1931, William Chalmers]
Key Frame Animation [1969, Nestor Burtnyk, Marcelli Wein]
CPR Mannequin: “ACTAR 911” [1989, Dianne Croteau, Richard Brault]
G-Suit [1941, Wilbur Rounding Franks]
Ardox Spiral Nail [1954, Allan Dove]
Automatic Lubricating Cup [1872, Elijah McCoy]
Crash-Position Indicator-CPI [1957, Harry Stevinson]
Caulking Gun [1894, Theodore Witte]
Separable Baggage Check [1882, John Mitchell Lyons]

[Josh Meyer]

I think I just realized that Scott Adams is the Antichrist.

Have you ever considered running for president or world dictator or something fun like that?

[T.G.]

Funny, that image americans have that they are the most generous on disaster help, i perceived it in France, Italy, U.K. and my own country applied respectively to each own nationality (the places i've been some time and have relatives). Seems media says what people like to hear on these cases.