How to Pick a President

When voting for a presidential candidate, keep in mind how often you will have to look at his or her face. This is especially important because presidents age quickly under the stress of the job. If you elect a president who is old and unattractive right out of the gate, things are going to get tragic fast.

To illustrate my point, I used software to digitally age one candidate, so you can see how he will look after a few weeks in the oval office.

You can do this at home. I invite you to pick any presidential candidate and post links to his/her picture and then to any picture that reminds you of the candidate.

To get you started, here are some links to pictures of the candidates from each party. You just have to find one you can match.

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Democratic-Presidential-Hopefuls/index.php

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Republican-Presidential-Hopefuls/index.php

Here's an example:

Fred Thompson Before:

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Republican-Presidential-Hopefuls/Former-Senator-Fred-Thompson-of-Tennessee.html

Fred Thompson After Eight Years:

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://alderaan.tgiforte.com/gallery/albums/tina/Skull_Front.sized.jpg&imgrefurl=http://alderaan.tgiforte.com/gallery/tina/Skull_Front&h=640&w=468&sz=77&hl=en&start=633&um=1&tbnid=fDndHm_dPiLz2M:&tbnh=137&tbnw=100&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dskull%26start%3D620%26ndsp%3D20%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN

Comments

[Choda Boy]

Scott,

I want to thank you for giving me back the 5 minutes I waste each week on your work. Now that I realize your political motives, I will take my business elsewhere.

Buh-bye!

[Rick]

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[Sondra]

Speaking of... I think McCain could win if he'd die his hair. He just has no distinguishing characteristics. Dark hair wouldn't blend so well with his skin tone.

[Matt]

Interesting... I followed your link to the Republican Party website and my Anti-virus and Data theft software went crazy. The site went phishing for my credit card number and I had to clean out TWO trojans and a data mining cookie after my very brief visit.

I'm glad I'm Canadian and have only apathy to vote for, or not, as the spirit moves me, or not.

[Al]

I am pretty sure this is how the people picked Warren Harding... and I wasn't alive back then, but I hear it didn't turn out well.

[Kyle Olbert]

Scott,

It looks pretty ridiculous for you to attack the looks of the two people who pose the biggest threat to your candidate's chances of winning the party nomination.

The minute you use this blog as a propagandist's tool again, I'm deleting you from my iGoogle.

-Kyle

[Scott]

Scott- check it.

Can you please use http://tinyurl.com for those long-ass links. You're messing up my bloglines viewer.

Thanks,
Scott

PS- keep up the good work. Your blog is always a refreshing look at the day's events....

[Mark Bowness]

These are all very funny and a very true comment too.

Mark Bowness

[isabelle dolce]

Paris for President. She looks terrific even after doing time.

http://isabelledolce.com/index.php?entry=entry070627-075443

[c4chaos]

before:
http://www.featurebank.com/images/hires/edt_hires.jpg

after:
http://eur.i1.yimg.com/eur.yimg.com/xp/premiere_photo/20051121/10/706407191.jpg

~C

[Steve Warner]

Actually, I have noticed for some time that Bush is the only world leader who never looked as if the cares of office affected him. Remember when he started his new job with a vacation? That is the kind of attitude that lets you ignore stress (or reality).

[not-timmy]

TOMMY!!

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/images/candidates/Republicans/tommy-thompson-2008-presidential-election-polls.jpg

TIMMY!!

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/9d/Wiki_timmy.gif

[Goatboy]

D. Mented Clinton smoked weed while studying Government at Oxford University, smoking cannabis has been illegal in English law since 1928 (whether you inhale or not)

[Harry Krak]

For a man who doesn't vote, you spend an awful lot of time discussing why people should, or should not, be voted for.

[twounicycles]

Hilary Clinton after 8 years???

www.anecdotage.com/pics/rotten.jpg

[Akira Yokota]

Condoleezza Rice Before: http://www.africanamericans.com/images2/CondoleezzaRiceBio.jpg

Condoleezza Rice After: http://www.whatsyourmotto.com/images/scott-adams-1.jpg

[Noah Vaile]

How come every time you come up with some extremely funny but even semi-political post some anti-Bush a-h has to say something that shows what a moron he is? Some damn fool has to say something nasty about our pres at every opportunity, even if it isn't one.

The man can't be that stupid. He managed to get the hardest to get job in the world without trying all that hard for all that long.

[Gabriel]

Rudy Giuliani

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Republican-Presidential-Hopefuls/Former-New-York-City-Mayor-Rudy-Giuliani-of-New-York.html

is also an actor/politician!

http://www.moviemaker.com/magazine/issues/50/images/duvall.portrait.jpg

And if Hillary Clinton were Brazilian

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Democratic-Presidential-Hopefuls/Senator-Hillary-Rodham-Clinton-of-New-York.html

she would be our Tourism Minister, Marta Suplicy [also a presidential for 2010]

http://www.partes.com.br/ed26/marta_suplicy.jpg

[Joel Odom]

I always vote for the guy who tells the funniest racial joke during the debates.

[m.a.]

Obama before:

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Democratic-Presidential-Hopefuls/Senator-Barack-Obama-of-Illinois.html

Obama after:

http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/MMPH/232338~Bill-Cosby-Posters.jpg

[Apolitical is the Only Way to Go]

Finally, a post I can guffaw at. There's so much political reality in the news to laugh at that most of your political posts just aren't that funny. This one was good. Must have been the visuals.

[Greg K]

Before and after of Fred Thompson. http://gregkennedy.blogspot.com/2007/07/scott-adams-presidential-comparison.html

[Kevin Kunreuther]

Funny funny,funnt.
I'm not gonna' vote for Clinton, now, though, doesn't she look kinda scary already? Brrrr! How about Sharon Stone, she looks almost hot at her age?

[Enough Wealth]

That's why you should do away with humans as president and install a computer system - in 8 years time it look as freah as the day it won office.
ps. Even a commodore 64 could make better decisions than the past few presidents (all you need is a random number generator)

Regards
http://enoughwealth.com

[CLD]

http://race42008.com/wp-content/design-imgs/bio_mitt_romney.jpg

Before

http://www.josephsmith.net/Static%20Images/brigham_young_MD.jpg

After

[CLD]

http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v53/wheatheart/?action=view¤t=separatedatbirth.jpg

Maybe this will work:

He's not really a candidate, I guess, but close enough. I made this two or three years ago. Dude has no fucking neck.

[Okgenuine]

Before - http://carlcoxphoto.com/assignment29.html

After 8 Years - http://vividfury.com/galleries/starwars_portrait_series/darth_sidious.html

Hehe. That's the best I could do.

[TomB]

Scott, you've mentioned entertaining a run at the big O (-val Office), I believe on the Oprah ticket. So here's your scientific age progression.

Scott Adams now:

http://www.grabow.biz/Comedy_Magic/ScottAdams.htm

Scott Adams in 8 years:

http://www.nathan-art.net/gallery/LiberalArt/Larry_David

[David]

Al Gore before:
http://hosted.ap.org/photos/X/XMB10409100823-big.jpg
and after:
http://www.otherlandtoys.co.uk/images/gremlin800.jpg
I don't know why I did that.

[Penethra]

Here's Bill Gates after eight years:

http://www.kostumeudlejning.dk/image2/kendte/Freddy_Mercury.jpg

[stupergenius]

A bit tangential but relevant I think.

Pope Benedict Before:
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Image:BentoXVI-28-10052007.jpg

Pope Benedict After:
http://www.cedmagic.com/featured/he-man/skeletor.jpg

[ComidaDos]

I feel sorry for the guy who posted his comment on the wrong blog entry. So let's all laugh at the pathetic bastard.

[squigs]

Excellent point.

Dorian Grey should stand for election!

[Phil Gerbyshak]

Scott - good thing you're not running for president. I can only imagine what you'd look like if Rudy looks like Gollum.

:)

Seriously funny stuff though! Thanks for the chuckle on Sunday!

[Jim]

You've been ripping on Romney for awhile now... nice to see you go after Giuliani and Thompson. Definitely makes you appear fair and balanced.

[just_human]

I'm not sure how out of date that site is, considering it lists Governor Vilsack, but if Fred Thompson was actually running, I'd vote for him. The man obviously knows how to act in front of a camera, and that, as far as the sheeple are concerned, is the most imporant feature. After all, if a man studders or or acts nervous in front of millions of people, he must be a retard, yuk yuk yuk, am I right?

[Mokkery]

The Fred Thompson skull was a riot!! I laughed my ass off when I saw it...then I realized something. If another republican gets elected, we’ll all look like that after 8 years.

[jerry w.]

I once would have said that there's no need to look more than four years into the future, since no one knows who will earn a second turn. Now, while shit for brains is still in office, I think it might be a valid concern.

It appears that not only, as my mother told me when I was a kid, can anyone can grow up to be president (or, not really grow up), but that said person could still be in office for a second term after screwing up worse than anyone in our history.

The real trick would be to show what's left of our constitution will look like in 2009, assuming that there is anything to show.

And, that's a big assumption.

http://boskolives.wordpress.com/

[Penethra]

I joked that our prime minister ought to be elected for his look and they didn't realize I was joking…

[Megalodon]

In such a case, we should have a porn star compete like that california governor candidate...at least she'll be easy on the eyes as she sodomizes another country for unclear reasons.

[The Tree]

WARNING! This picture is not to be taken seriously.

John Edwards now
and after the election:
http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/5776/johnhitleryf9.png

[Bromond]

Here's one for the liberal side...

Al Gore before:
http://illuminati-news.com/graphics/GoreAl(3).jpg

Al Gore after eight years:
http://micksylum.bravehost.com/myPictures/crazy_old_man.jpg

[TwoUnicycles]

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/4711689.stm

The BBC news site says that (ex)Prime Minister Tony Blair spent more than £1,800 of taxpayers' money on cosmetics and make-up artists when in office.

We wuz robbed.

Irish premier Bertie Ahern, is reported to have spent more than £115,000 on his appearance since 1997.

Can George W top that?

[Todd]

No fair ragging on my boy Rudy. I know he's seemed a little bipolar lately with the softpedaling his social positions (gotta make that conservative base feel comfortable) but even back when he was being NYC's mayor there was no evidence of his ever biting off anyone's finger. Nothing solid. And I'm sure he flossed afterward.
Fred, on the other hand, pretty much already looks like that. Still gets the chicks, too.

[Bromond]

This is kinda stupid, but fun...

Condoleeza Rice:
http://mooreslore.corante.com/archives/images/condoleeza%20rice.jpg

Condoleeza Rice after eight years:
http://centurychina.com/plaboard/uploads/condoleezza_rice_dog.jpg

[HockeyMonkey]

Just wondering if we posters can place images using html, or if we have to use links. In any case, with all the "old pres" pictures, i figure she can pretty this page up. I'd vote for her.

[Bromond]

I don't know why, but I am finding more matches for the republican candidates...

Mitt Romney:
http://graphics.boston.com/bonzai-fba/AP_Photo/2004/10/18/1098092365_4930.jpg

Mitt Romney after eight years:
http://www.sptimes.com/News/083101/photos/2b-rogers.jpg

[Frank Roche]

Oh, man, that Fred Thompson one...."chroist" that's funny.

[Matteo522]

Ron Paul Today:

http://www.enterstageright.com/archive/articles/1003/102703paulron.jpg

Ron Paul after the mutant invasion of 2011:

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/8/8c/Magnetox3.jpg

Who's side are YOU on?

[John Elliot]

+1 Rudy -> Gollum

We would have also accepted the Crypt Keeper; another Daily Show favorite. Gollum is clearly the superior choice, though, when viewing the reigns of power as the One Ring.

Although if we are to follow your advice we should lower the age requirements for President and select a teenage female (~16) to lead the country.

[Bromond]

Your Giuliani match-up was pretty good. Mine is not as good, but I gave it my best try:

Mike Huckabee before:
http://delivery.viewimages.com/xv/74068648.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=17A4AD9FDB9CF1932BBB80AB57C976025C65709768717034879D000F7E7BD7FE

Mike Huckabee after eight years:
http://www.lbfca.com/images/may03/peterboyle1a.jpg

[mingz]

nice

[BillF]

I thought the same of our current president.
In fact, I assumed the following realization was why many of his staff resigned...

[img]http://63.127.169.137/billf/bushtoflagg.swf[/img]

http://63.127.169.137/billf/bushtoflagg.swf

[Ranjith]

Ha... ha... ha...very funny

[Jedi Kevin]

Here are my pics.

http://blogs.sun.com/kevin/entry/dilbert_our_future_president

[Gleetnorx]

gollum
gollum
my precious

[Danny]

For Fred Thompson Before:

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Republican-Presidential-Hopefuls/Former-Senator-Fred-Thompson-of-Tennessee.html

For Freddie After Eight Years:

http://www.toonopedia.com/droopy.htm

[Telbert]

John Edwards: http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/images/candidates/Democrats/john-edwards-2008-presidential-election-polls.jpg

Gilbert Huph:
http://filmi.punt.nl/upload/incredibles/incredibles_huph.gif

[William of Urbana]

Sir, you have inspired me to create a new Facebook group to get behind the eventual leader of the free world early in his struggle.

Tallest Guy for President

You have not lived this day in vain. Unless I wimp out on this. In that case, I'm confident you will come up with something.

[Chris Maturkanich]

Rich people don't usually play the lotto. They view it as "a tax on people who are bad at math". For poor and blue collar people, they view it as the only real way to get ahead and be secure. They want to keep on working because staying home all the time gets boring after a week or so. Some lottos actually have repeat winners (NJ Pick 6) You only hear about the endearing ones because that's all the news will report. There's the guy from West Virginia who won the biggest Powerball ever and then went to jail I think. He already owned his own business before he won. There's Elicia Dickinson who tried to sue her way into the winner's circle. They're not all saints. I'm sure the occasional rich person plays and wins. But you won't hear about that anywhere but the actual lotto website because the general public doesn't want to hear that.

Hey, here's one for you though... In Pennsylvania they always say "Lottery proceeds benefit older Pennsylvanians" Yeah, 'cuz they're the only ones who win! *L*

It Pays To Dream!

[Karl N]

Ron Paul before:
http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Republican-Presidential-Hopefuls/Representative-Ron-Paul-of-Texas.html

Ron Paul after:
http://www.kapitalizm.republika.pl/reagan.jpg

[Brad]

That wasn't the after picture for Fred Thompson. That was our current Secretary of Homeland Security, Michael Chertoff:

http://www.ruggedelegantliving.com/a/images/Michael.Chertoff.jpg

We all know you are supporting Mitt Romney now. But we wonder... If he'd tossed his cat on top of the stay-wag instead of his Irish Setter, would you be so enamored with his boyish good looks?

[Amy]

I hate to say this, but WPE! (Worst Post Ever)! Nothing funny, nothing insightful. Hoping for something better, come Monday. We understand -- working Sundays is hard. :)

[Marxist]

In Soviet Russia, President picks YOU!!!

[forthnoggin]

Duncan Hunter before:
http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Republican-Presidential-Hopefuls/Representative-Duncan-Hunter-of-California.html

Duncan Hunter after (not voting for this guy would be pretty smart):
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.deathreference.com/images/medd_01_img0078.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.deathreference.com/Ho-Ka/Jonestown.html&h=359&w=235&sz=12&hl=en&start=5&sig2=kBBdNwFJIKJxookBZHSdjg&um=1&tbnid=e8u8PruUskvNKM:&tbnh=121&tbnw=79&ei=2-mHRrWoNp-MeYa5pOMB&prev=/images%3Fq%3Djim%2Bjones%2Bcult%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DG

[forthnoggin]

Clinton before:
http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Democratic-Presidential-Hopefuls/Senator-Hillary-Rodham-Clinton-of-New-York.html

Clinton after another botox injection:
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.washspkrs.com/cropped_speakers/j_theisman2.jpg&imgrefurl=http://wordpress.com/tag/mnf/feed/&h=198&w=151&sz=35&hl=en&start=7&sig2=46tUYyoKRa0SntZcSxrgUw&um=1&tbnid=K1AjfQv6A9MDBM:&tbnh=104&tbnw=79&ei=teiHRo6eLpWEeN_fvOUB&prev=/images%3Fq%3Djoe%2Btheisman%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1B3GGGL_enUS217US217

[Sam]

Before: http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Democratic-Presidential-Hopefuls/Senator-Hillary-Rodham-Clinton-of-New-York.html
After: http://history.memphis.edu/images/catherine_siena.gif

[forthnoggin]

Obama before:
http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Democratic-Presidential-Hopefuls/Senator-Barack-Obama-of-Illinois.html

Obama after:
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://graphics.jsonline.com/graphics/sports/brew/img/mar04/bonds327.jpg&imgrefurl=http://shakedownsports.com/tag/baseball/page/2/&h=500&w=381&sz=30&hl=en&start=10&sig2=WOKNApL6lOQCDQ_6WUuwGw&um=1&tbnid=6euznKvx2RgrnM:&tbnh=130&tbnw=99&ei=3-eHRvmtKJ3EeLymvO8B&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbarry%2Bbonds%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1B3GGGL_enUS217US217%26sa%3DN

[Kristina L.]

It is amazing how being president ages a person.

[forthnoggin]

Even though she's not running, Condelezza Rica after 8 years:
http://www.nflplayers.com/images/players/19944.jpg

[Real Live Girl]

How scary is this?

Fred Thompson before:

http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/Issues/Candidates/Republican-Presidential-Hopefuls/Former-Senator-Fred-Thompson-of-Tennessee.html

Fred Thompson after:

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/mugshots/riptornmug1.html

[rd]

in other words, you are asking how is leg
not bad, thank you
it's going to get amputated if you allow me mild exaggeration
so reminds me i'm perishable too

i'd report on the status of the limb earlier
but somebody was acting cold and getting analytical on the middle east :)
though i liked your absurd and funny solutions
as an old saying goes water is stronger than hardrock stone
it curves its way, it polishes sharp edges, it makes sand etc
though the middleasterners'd cherish their pride more than physical harm or financial reward as it is common at least for the eastern cultures

sorry don't have any pics
besides amprez's strictly american matter

[Mrs L]

Hillary won't age in office, she'll just get another facelift.

Hillary before:
http://www.presidentpolls2008.com/images/candidates/Democrats/hillary-rodham-clinton-2008-presidential-election-polls.jpg
Hillary after:
http://imgred.com/http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i220/ledzepbass92388/the20joker.jpg

[The Tree]

Joe Biden now:
http://www.famousplagiarists.com/images/BigBiden.jpg
After a few weeks:
http://www.gwiezdne-wojny.pl/grafika/2003/lip/unl_sidious_03.jpg

[alex Deich]

Barack Obama becomes The Thing from Fantastic Four.

[Penethra]

Cool scull.

[D. Mented]

Sad but true.
I don't care about a president's looks, age, gender, physical health, race, creed, or sexual habits, as long as he or she is competent, intelligent, diplomatic, and not a criminal (little known fact; Clinton smoked weed in a country where it was not illegal. Bush got DUI's and got busted with cocaine in a country where these actions were illegal)
Unfortunately, the press-especially television- makes more money showing attractive faces, so that's what they promote.
We need to neuter everyone who even suggests (seriously - I can recognise a joke ) that the important factor in picking a candidate is looks.
Not a popular decision, but hey - neither is war, and we're managing that.
D. Mented