Aroused by Pie

There was a study in the late nineties that showed males become aroused by certain scents.

http://health.msn.com/centers/mensexualhealth/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100167992

The biggest winner in the smells-that-make-men-horny contest was pumpkin pie. The researchers are baffled by why that particular smell is so effective. Allow me to help them out with the explanation part.

When a man smells a pumpkin pie, it means there’s a 90% chance a woman baked it. And she must be around here someplace. That’s worth half a boner right there.

Researchers found that the combination of licorice and pumpkin pie worked even better than pumpkin pie alone. Again, duh. If I smell pumpkin pie AND licorice, the odds of a woman being nearby rocket to about 99.9%.

Second, making a pie is a lot of work compared to other things. So there’s a good chance the woman who baked it is a pleaser. The pleasing probably won’t stop with the pie, if you know what I mean, wink-wink.

Third, pumpkin pie is not the obvious first choice for baking. Apple pie is a more obvious choice. Chocolate cake is more obvious. A woman who bakes a pumpkin pie is clearly a little freaky. Gentleman, start your engines!

The research showed that perfume didn’t have the same effect on men as food smells. Again, that’s no surprise to me. When I smell perfume, my first thought is “What’s she trying to cover up?” I’m not thinking I got to get me some of that.

My weakness is vanilla. One whiff and I have to check my driver’s license to remember my name and address. I once made the mistake of getting vanilla scent after a car wash. My car has a stick shift. You can imagine the confusion. I spent twenty minutes trying to find first gear. I would still be there if the other customers hadn’t banded together to push my car into the street.

Comments

[Pearl]

Actually, its weird...because its true. My best friend is studying to be a sex therapist at a the reputable academy of Benedictine and we laugh at all sorts of weird shit like this. Smell of food = woman ever since fuckin cave man days! Smell of odd yet tasty food = kink. I remember randomly baking pumpkin pie for my boyfriend... hah that was some good sex.

[dawmdt]

What the hell's licorice? Is it similar to liquorice?

[dawmdt]

What the hell's licorice? Is it similar to liquorice?

[Jenna]

"A woman who bakes a pumpkin pie is clearly a little freaky." This statement was so funny I just made it my MySpace headline. No one will know what the hell it means, but it made me laugh my ass off! hahaha

And, yeah, I'm a little freaky!!! ;)

[not me]

I like Cake more than pie. odd.

[James]

I think that whoever did this study was a cheap-ass for buying plain cheese pizza. Dude, how much more expensive would it have been to have gotten the pepperoni on it? Geez!

[carrie]

I just now got a chance to read the post but I have to comment on this...you're right on. Pie is probably the world's most perfect dessert but its harder to make than a cake or something else generic so anyone who makes pie is someone who wants to go out of their way to make others happy. Case in point, I make pie and I'm a pleaser. You're very perceptive

[Kevin Kunreuther]

Geez, do I hafta' say what aromatic pheromone makes me harder than an eight inch roll of Eisenhower dollars - oops that's a picture you'ld rather not have in your head - too late!

Make mine patchouli with a hint of vanilla.

(Doing a lot of catch-up with your posts - was sick in the hospital for a few days - I'll spare the detail, twas enough to say it was painful, lifethreatening and disgusting.)

[brian]

What so your knob is as big as a gear stick?

Really?

Mine too.

[RipplingBeast]

Scott, you've delved deeply into secrets, here, you Deep Delver, you.

The woman I lusted for most and don't even remember what she looked like was wearing chocolate-chip-cookie-scent perfume; swear to God. She explained my instant reaction to her friends: "Men love food."

My French Chick, may she live forever, rubbed her body with real vanilla extract after her twice-daily showers (I know; why did she need a shower twice a day? Dunno; she smelled and tasted great, so I didn't ask). Ever since, I've asked my girlfriends to wear natural food scents. You can get cherry, vanilla, almond (a personal favorite) and more, at the grocery store for a buck or so per bottle, and with a dab here and there, you've got a woman who's good enough to eat, and there's a crowd of men around her at parties, which is always a compliment to your success in the mating competition.

While the food thing is not widely known, it is very, very old. I hope it provides a lot of the readers here with some very sweet memory-making.

[Jeff]

blueberry. I forget all kinds of things when I smell that.

[Dan Quixote]

Agreed - women like the smell of cash the best. My own wife professes that's what attracted her! (Apparently I don't smell as good now that she's made us broke).

[it's me]

I think there was a Fox Trot cartoon about a company that did research on basic male hormones and developed a pepperoni pizza scented perfume.

[pro-persian(the-cat)]

Vanilla comes from orchids. Per Wikipedia:
"The term 'orchid' derives from the Greek ορχις orchis, meaning "testicle", from the appearance of subterranean tuberoids of the genus Orchis."
Vanilla is the scent of the testicle flower. If the woman smells of another's testicles, a man is driven to reassert his claim on her.
It is all about competition, dominance, and power. It always is.

[Ms_Takez]

My guy is somewhat allergic to perfume, so I had to give that up. But I don't make it to work clean half the time since it seems that the smell of soap & shampoo (any kind) is what gets him going.

Personally, I reeeeeeally like warm, musky, spicy smells. Obsession for Men is really close, I've loved a LIGHT application of this since high school. Freakishly enough, my guy actually sweats this smell. I thought I'd lost my mind when I met him!

[Gandalf]

"My car has a stick shift. You can imagine the confusion."
ROFL, kicking my feet, I'm laughing so hard!

From the article:
"One involved 30 women playing a computer game. Permeating the air was a
novel odor concocted from buttered popcorn, dirt, and rain. The more
satisfying it was for a woman to play the game, the more likely it was for
her to rate the odor as pleasant."

Doesn't this suggest that liking the game, and/or doing well in that
session, caused the women to rate the smell more positively rather than
vice versa?

And:

"...if your first sexual experience was at Thanksgiving under the dessert
table, then that scent may become associated with it. In the future, when
you smell pumpkin pie, you are brought back to that time and place in a
very instant and visceral way, and may experience sexual arousal."

Um, exactly how widespread is this phenomenon? I don't know about the
rest of you folks, but the only people who celebrated Thanksgiving with us
when I was a youth were relatives. Close relatives.

I think maybe the researchers have been doing a little sniffing of
their own. Of... something...

[agm]

Not speaking for every woman, mind you, but I find the smell of wood polish, lawnmower fumes, and popsicles arousing. If I smell all three together, my eyes glaze over.

[Maravillosa]

Interesting, especially since my brother and I have birthday's a week apart and approx nine months after Thanksgiving.

[dsadsasdadsa]

alert('dsds')

[jerry w.]

What smell works for me?

Fish!!!

There are only two things that smell like fish,
and one of them is fish.

If I was blind and lost in a fish market, don't
even try to rescue me.

This could be why they call the person that cleans
the fish a "Boner".

http://boskolives.wordpress.com/

[Sondra]

I agree with Brown University psychologist, Rachel Herz. This 'study' sounds like someone just wanted to play with penises. "40% more blood flow' And how did they measure that?

[Tom Gao]

I'm not a rev-head but I just can't get enough of diesel. I've loved the smell of heavy traffic since as far as memory serves. Back in primary/elementary school I used to hang out near the school crossing just to get a whiff of that sweet, sweet poison. I'm also probably the only person who would enjoy the occasional traffic gridlock to take advantage of the fumes with all windows down.

Maybe move 2 NY one day. Hmm...

[anonimo italiano]

Happy Blog Day, Scott.
I'm usually lurking here, but I couldn't live without this blog.
I recommend my readers to come and give it a try :)
I'll eventually have a pumpkin pie delivered to you, as a sign of gratitude. :D

[Dave]

SUGGESTION:

Deleting members of society. Who would you dump first and who would dump last? i.e. Televangelists first and plumbers last?

[Marxist]

Napalm.