People Who Don’t Need People

Did you read about the Zimbabwean female athlete who has a penis, a vagina, and a last name of Sithole? That’s what I call covering all the bases.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/4249949.stm

The athlete claims she was born with both male and female sex organs, and a traditional healer made the penis “disappear” for a while. I can imagine the healer’s thought process during his treatment. It probably went something like this: “How can I make this penis disappear? If only there were some sort of compartment, or crevice nearby that was coincidentally the right size to hide a penis. Wait a minute…Hello!”

Those traditional healers have a good racket. They just yank some weeds out of the ground, grind them up with some crickets and goat blood, wave them over the patient, and declare him healed. If the patient doesn’t get better, just blame him for underpaying you.

Patient: “It has been a week since you waved those weeds at me and I am still covered with boils.”

Healer: “Oh yeah? Well, the chicken you gave me lays small eggs, so I guess we’re even.”

I can’t help wondering how the follow-up visit with Ms. Sithole and her healer went.

Sithole: “My penis reappeared. What should I do?”

Healer: “Go f**k yourself, Sithole.”

Sithole: “What?!!!!”

Healer: “Seriously. Pay the receptionist one chicken on the way out. And make it a good one or you’re going to grow another penis on your forehead.”

Comments

[velix]

Yea right, he made it disappear... with what knife and fork. :)

[big M]

wow i never heard of this woman/man before. that is really disgusting in a sense, but sad at the same time.
i wonder if guys would actually want to be with her?!?

[erkek arkadas]

very funny :)

[Ms Chingona]

So if you have two sexual organs, male and female, how do you pee? and what if you are trying to pee sit down and your urine flows out of the wrong hole? Very intriguing.

[Jeff]

YES, but how do we get rid of all the Demcrats like Tierny from MA rushing to condemn Pakistan because it has been an ally agaisnt muslim terrorists? What part of never get along only want to dominate do the Democrats not get?

[Real Live Girl]

I only fly the friendly skies. :P

[Wil]

Scott–Why'd you ignore this line:

"The multi-talented athlete has competed in regional tournaments in javelin throw, shot-putt..."

Let me draw your attention to: multi-talented... javelin throw... shot-putt...

On that note, what's up with shot-putting? Both the Zimbabwean athlete and the Bahrain one (http://www.kuwaittimes.net/read_news.php?newsid=MTIyOTgwMjcxMQ==) compete (play?) shot-put...

Zimbabwe:
"The multi-talented athlete has competed in regional tournaments in ... shot-putt, winning several gold medals."

Bahrain:
"A champion shot-putter and discus-thrower"

This is wrong in so many metaphorical levels, it proves there is a God–and he has a brilliant sense of humor.

[Fáránlegt Skilyrði]

I can't believe that you managed to write a whole post without mentioning your new book.

[Carlbert]

If you find the name "Sithole" amusing, here's another: "Sexwale".

Unfortunately neither of them are pronouced the way you'd expect in English, but I don't want to take away your amusement so I won't elaborate.

[La Dawnita]

The story gets more interesting. Apparently he/she lied about his name too. He/she took the birth certificate of a girl who's father is named...really now....
Givemore Sithole.

That's just ridiculous.

http://www.newzimbabwe.com/pages/incest21.12294.html

[karl]

I'm way more than a little curious how that would look.

[Oliver]

Just as a note:
It is pronounced Si-tho-le

I am sure you were pronouncing it in your mind sit-hole...

:)

[Enough Wealth]

What tribe has a TRADITION of healing hermaphrodites?

Regards
http://enoughwealth.com

[Billy Arvia]

Scott,

The amazing thing is that he/she/it ever left the house. I would probably never leave the bedroom...

(Hi everybody. I KNOW you missed me)

http://triplebee.squarespace.com/

[me]

Dear Dilbert

Please do a cartoon that uses the words "rend" and "manatee".

Thanks in advance

[Euan]

Ms Real Live Girl, is "going down in the Alps" a euphemism?

[Kevin Kunreuther]

I once dated a Miss Nude Ohio contestant who had two vaginas - true story! - the outside looks normal but inside, it's like a small cave that splits in two directions. She has had children since we dated, all by Ceasarean, all boys. No, I've never asked if any of them had two penises or two pairs of testicles.

[lastangelman]

As a former resident of Bahrain (1976-1983), I can testify that this country has had more than its fair share of hermaphrodites than other countries. In 1982, a newborn Bahraini hermaphrodite became the youngest gender assignment recipient at eighteen days (the penis was snipped - no, it was not an accidental circumcision - and the testicles removed). My guess is why this happens so much there can be traced to regressive genes - most locals are at least each other's third or fourth cousin.

[klaus]

Thank you.

[Oli]

this reminds me so much of the special olympics episode on south park, of course on this occasion the woman/man wins the gold medals where as cartman got beaten by retards (I use that word in the medical sense for any hypocritical PC penis stains out there)

http://ramblingsofanofficeworker.blogspot.com

[Lag]

Two and a half years ago? Your news aren't so new...

[Marxist]

A good shotpun.

[Angel]

I'm sure you know this, but just in case you didn't, we pronounce the surname Sithole as "See-toh-lee"

[Swaroop]

oh Man.. still cant stop laughing.. the names funnier. sItH0le!

[theangelofdarkness]

this article is more than two years old...
i mean, it's funny, but not two years old funny...

an article i thought you might be interested in...
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml;jsessionid=DUEOPR5GO0AO5QFIQMFSFFWAVCBQ0IV0?xml=/news/2007/11/05/wlimbs105.xml
(more recent too!)