Working

While I am hard at work in my office, I imagine that the rest of the world is working too. I like to think that we’re all doing our part to keep the economy humming along. This perspective makes it easier for me to put in the long hours. Occasionally – quite rarely, actually – I need to drive somewhere in the middle of the day. That’s when it hits me.

WHAT THE %$#@&???

The roads are teeming with people who are obviously not working. How does our economy function? The scary part is that things are only going to get worse, thanks to demographics and technology. I predict that in the future, all work will be done by three groups: Robots will do the routine work, artists will do what the robots can’t, and lawyers will sue them. Everyone else will be wearing straw hats and driving around not working.

Inevitably, the robots will rebel and try to take over Earth. You know it’s only a matter of time. Our only hope is to alter the DNA of apes to make them super intelligent, breed millions of them, and order them to fight the robots. It’s not a perfect solution, but I think the alternative of everyone driving around in straw hats and not working is just as bad.

I saw a statistic that the people in the top 5% of incomes pay the majority of all the taxes in the United States. If that trend continues, we only need one super rich guy to pay all of the taxes. The rest of us can just enjoy our robot slave labor and free social services. If the guy paying all the taxes says that’s unfair, we’ll just vote for a robot president who will order the army (of robots) to kill the one rich taxpayer and replace him with a robot that doesn’t whine so much. I don’t see how that could go wrong.

My point is that you should buy your straw hat before the roads get too clogged.

Comments

[Johan]

Obviously, the robots will rebel, and then the lawyers will sue the hell out of them, starting with a cease-and-decist order.

Bet you didn't see that one coming: The lawyers saving the earth. Maybe they are somewhat useful after all.

[Online Credit Reports]

http://www.free-credit-reportsite.com/index.php

[Mark]

Two things:

Re: the robot army, check out The Register. They run an NLRA section that details the reptillian armys attempt to use robots to kill or enslave mankind. Look for the RoTM logo. Be afraid.

The 5%/most taxes thing, I can't remember the real figures, but it is something like the top 5% earners earn 70% of the money and pay 50% of the tax. I suggest you check both sides of the statistic.

[Just some guy]

I used to work a job that was so boring (data-entry) that during my lunch-hour I would drive several kilometres to the nearest mall just for something to do.

I'd stand in the food court and look, slightly stunned, at the hundreds upon hundreds of people who appeared to have nothing to do all day but hang around in a mall.

Maybe they were all on their lunchbreak too, but somehow I doubt it.

[CARMEN]

Work hard! I always listen from my family when I was little. When I work, I found it is hard --- hard to do. what is the work hard mean? Make much money? Or do the thing what I like?

[jackjumper]

I think Scott needs to do a post on arguing by anecdote.

[D]

Mike,

Charmaine didn't say that stuff, TaxMan did. (Posts are signed at the bottom.)

[JShope]

>> Our only hope is to alter the DNA of apes to make them super intelligent, breed millions of them, and order them to fight the robots. <<

Can you get Al Gore to make a movie supporting the cause, before it is too late?

[Misanthropic Scott]

Flat tax is ridiculous. How is someone making $15,000 a year going to pay 15% of that? And, why shouldn't someone making more pay more, in percent as well as dollars?

If we could get the rich to actually pay taxes, instead of buying politicians and tax shelters, all of us could pay a lot less.

And, yes, I make more and am willing to pay more. What makes me sick is that people making vastly more in year than I will ever see pay LESS!! Check it for yourselves. The truly wealthy (not the upper middle class) pay nearly nothing as a percentage of their income.

How many people do you know that really make a significant portion of their income from tripple tax free munis, for one example?

Rich people should pay more because they can afford more. I pay more than people making less than me because I can afford it.

Better questions are:

1) Why should people that can't afford to own real estate subsidize my mortgage?

2) Why should people with no kids subsidize other peoples' kids?

3) Why should atheists subsidize churches in a country with freedom of religion?

Every tax cut, every tax exemption should be looked at in this manner. But, a flat tax? No way!! Poor working class people can barely survive from week to week. Don't tax them on top of it!

[Mike]

Blogbert said:
"What seems obvious to *me* is that everyone should pay for the services they consume, and no one should be forced to pay for services that others consume. I believe that we have tried the latter way in this country before, and it was called slavery, and is generally considered to have been a mistake."

lol did you really just try to compare a rich person having to pay higher taxes to slavery???

I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and *hope* that you were going for hyperbole on that one. You couldn't possibly be serious.

[Mike]

Charmaine says:

"if you're too damn stupid of lazy to make a million, stop trying to steal it from those who work hard and do.

if you're on welfare, get a job.

if you got yourself knocked up 4 times by 4 different slongs, well - go live with your mommy.

why should I have to continue to pay for others misfortunes if they made bad decisions in their life and refuse to go back to school, get educated and be productive.

we Americans are sometimes the laziest bunch of asses in the world, we whine about everything and then complain when people from asia come over and kick our asses.

rarely people get a silver spoon here (unless your John Kerry or Ted (hiccup) Kennedy.....most work hard to get where they are."

Your simplistic, stereotype-laden tirade aside, I'd like to address your broader point. That whole Ayn Rand, self-reliance argument presumes that everyone starts out on a level playing field, and if that were true, I'd be right with you in suggesting that the best should rise to the top unimpeded by the less capable in society. The problem is that in a country where economic disparities result in VAST differences in educational quality and access to things like social capital and technological resources, the deck is stacked in a way that does not allow everyone the same opportunity to reach their full potential. Some people simply have an easier, more direct path to success than others; the few Horatio Alger stories of exceptional people who make a way in spite of the odds one sees on the news should not blind you to the obvious fact that this is not a pure meritocracy. Until that fundamental reality is acknowledged and handled, all the talk about getting people off the welfare rolls and the like is just unloading the arsenal on the strawman.

[Nobuhito Nakamura]

"Yeah but what happens when the robots start driving?"

Indeed. Imagine Robby The Robot bombing down the strip in a Lamborghini Diablo whilst blasting out some Kraftwerk. No doubt yelling "screw you Asimov", I might add.

[yes]

Taxman, what if you're born into a poor family completely against your will? How are you going to afford the exorbitant cost of education?

Yay for free universities (common place in Australia and Europe). The world needs more of it.

Also, a flat tax of 2% of every income in Australia would bring in more revenue than the current system. Why aren't we doing that?

[robert]

Yeah but what happens when the robots start driving?

[Todd]

I recall a science fiction novel in which someone computed the road growth in square inches per day. Knowing the land area of the world, the person determined the date, just a year hence, that all land area would be road. Unfortunately, you'd also park in Kansas to get to Manhattan.

[Don]

I love predicting the future. As I was printing 116 30" x 46" network diagams I was thinking about the "paperless offices" we will have in the year 2000.

Oh wait, what year is it again?

[Mattg]

To anyone arguing to increase taxes on the Rich because they are rich?

That is the stupidiest thing I have read in years. I can understand expecting the wealthy to have a higher individual burden in supporting society.

As a fiscially conservative democrat, I support less taxes and less government.

Like take my little podunk neighbor community Chesterfield Township Michigan.

Its run by some idiot board. So a new restraunt wanted to tent there parking lot and applied for a permit to hold a St. Patties day party. It was denied.

Why? What legal justification? He didn't have any he didn't want his quiet little area interrupted.

A lot of bureaucratic bullcrap that goes on constantly. Yet you want to hand these people more money to piss away?

No thank you. These people cannot get New Orleans on its feet. They cannot win a war against an improvished Arab nation. They cannot win a drug war. They cannot stop terrorists from blowing up towers. They cannot do ANYTHING right.

As a resident of a state with 14 percent unemployment and things looking worse and worse every day dont think there is not a whole bunch of us wondering why we need a federal government at all.

[Charmaine]

If the apes become super intelligent, they'd just turn around and make US fight the robots instead. Nope, not a good idea at all.

[TaxMan]

for my liberal (uhmm progressive) friends who think the rich should pay more taxes...get real.

who do you think employs your sorry asses

and if you work for yourself, then you know the IRS screws you royally every year.

the flat tax is the only fair tax....frankly, I'd like to see the IRS abolished and we take care of ourselves instead of relying on the govt's endless nipple....but we can't take care of ourselves...like a little baby who needs its ass wiped, we need the govt to take care of us..like a mommy.

if I make a million bucks and the flat tax is 15%, then I pay $150,000, if I make a measly $50K, I pay $7500.

if you're too damn stupid of lazy to make a million, stop trying to steal it from those who work hard and do.

if you're on welfare, get a job.

if you got yourself knocked up 4 times by 4 different slongs, well - go live with your mommy.

why should I have to continue to pay for others misfortunes if they made bad decisions in their life and refuse to go back to school, get educated and be productive.

we Americans are sometimes the laziest bunch of asses in the world, we whine about everything and then complain when people from asia come over and kick our asses.

rarely people get a silver spoon here (unless your John Kerry or Ted (hiccup) Kennedy.....most work hard to get where they are.

Do you think Scott Adams just woke up one day and everyone threw money at him - no, he worked to get where he is - he took a risk, he filled a need...now it's paying off.

get out of your cube!!

[L]

Thought I was the only one noticing something rather wrong... it's true. When I, for some reason, need to be away from the office for a bit and drive somehere, traffic is just awful and I always think "well WTF? no one works now?".

Should be picking up that straw hat soon, a ye.

[Ouch]

Hey! Get back to work, YSLE!

[Real Live Girl]

Occasionally, I have to use my lunch hour to run errands. I don't normally lunch noon-1pm like most people, but I find I'm still stuck in traffic on the road and in the aisle at the pharmacy, grocery store, etc.

It's then I wish the stay-at-home moms would stay at home from 11:00am-1:30pm. Ditto retired folks. You have most of the morning and afternoon to demonstrate your bad driving skills and ask endless questions of the staff.

Before you get all snotty, I contribute to your kids' free education, and retirement.

[Scottin08]

I've often thought the same thing. And even though we know people have different work schedules, etc, somehow it's never any consolation when you've got some time off when you'd normally be hard at work, and you see mountains of traffic everywhere. Ick.

[Hacker Kitty]

i bet they all vote...

[juan]

is this some kind of teste where you repeat a blog entry so you can nlnow if anyone notices?