May 2008

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One of you best Scott! I was just wandering if you were not getting a form of paranoia with all the articles about yourself.


-Does that mean terrorists are IBS?-

that made me giggle as much as the original post :)


I am not Jet poop.

If only for the fact I do not take jets to go on holiday..


Do cars/busses/trains count?
I could be a fiat poop?

The Hammer

The Needler...the logic of a 6000 year old planet is flawless. Read "Answers in Genesis"


What the hell?
Why are you posting this for?

Isn't this common knowledge?


I think you're on to something. By the definition you cite, which seems solid, the 787 is alive. It's a pretty dumb organism though, as organisms go. But I think you missed the mark on what the 787 "eats." It would eat jet fuel and poop exhaust. That's pretty simple, I should think. Humans have a simbiotic relationship with the 787. The jet is, by itself, very stupid. Although it's very capable physically, I don't think it's all there mentally. A truly intelligent jet would be able to get signals from the control tower, and make a complete flight without the aid of a pilot. Now, this organism needs three members of another species to sit in its brain and do stuff for it. Plus a few more to serve drinks. The humans aid the jet in "thinking" and in return are transported to places. It's a nice trade-off, I should think.


Can one 787 create another 787 on its own will? Flowers pollinate from other flowers with the help of bees and breeze but the pollen grains are from other flower of the same specious.
Besides have you ever seen an eagle crash and die. A plane does, so there you go.


"Yes, but does it have a free wheel? Mwahahaha...oh, that was funny...

very very funny indeed :-)


"Once upon a time there were dinosaurs. They died and decomposed and turned into oil. Millions of years later, humans turned that oil into plastic. Recently, plastic became the major building material for the new Boeing 787 Dreamliner. There’s your proof that dinosaurs can fly."

The important part about humor is that it should be based on a kernel of truth. Unfortunately, almost your entire joke is based on ignorance. First, oil didn't come from dinosaurs. Biogenic oil theory is based on compressed decayed plant life. Second, carbon fiber and plastic are not the same thing-- not even close. Third, we already know dinsaurs flew, so your "proof" is irrelevant.


In complete agreement with Frans. ... People are really acting weird to poke seriousness into this well glued post ... As someone with no credibility says, Defining and Analyzing Humor is a Pastime of Humorless People .... Think about it guys, thats just a weird thought :)


You are scaring me again! ;-D



You talk about improving Scott's posts setting up a process that helps people improve their agruements then make a really crappy one yourself.

You wrote:

"Can anyone think of a bona fide living thing that can reproduce without any involvment of one of the same species?"
How about: the first of every species. Since species can't by definiation interbreed to produce fertile offspring the "first born" of every new species was made "without any involvment of one of the same species"."

It's a weird statement because there's no mechanism for the creation of a "First born" in a new species. If you're a creationalist, God made everything in 6 days and there are therefore no new species. If your a evolutionalist you should realise how difficult it would be to found a whole species on just the first copy....

A species is a product of a lot of genetic differences occuring over a very long period of time. It's impossible to say "this was the first antelope" for example because inevitably the antelopes mum and dad will look a lot like the new antelope!

Big Al

Most people agree that a plane isn't alive... which it isn't... but most of the reasons people use are I'll read through the rest of the comments and see if anyones figured it out yet.


Pretty obviously no intelligent life in the universe




This might help explain why planes could be considered alive.

Darth Geoff

Maybe life is like pornography: Can't be defined, but you know it when you see it.
In any case, I've come to the conclusion your argument is bogus because it doesn't address frequent flyer miles.

Bill McCai

Does this mean when the wheels come out during landing, the plane is sexually aroused? And just after it's vigorous intercourse with the ground, we're released. So I'm pretty sure that makes us its sperm. Considering you say we're the reason it reproduces, this makes even more sense.

I'm just jealous I don't have a team come out to service me when I'm done.


The BBC's Gaza correspondent Alan Johnston has been freed!

But in more important news, the Gaza City neighbourhood where he was being held is inhabited by the Doghmush clan.



Thanks, I will start looking for DanW comments. Sometimes you're not entertaining enough, and you're the only one that reads everyone's comments and can point out which ones we should read.

Ben B

"I wouldn't say the 787 reproduces, because it has zero influence on the production of new 787s."

If one 787 is commercially successful (in other words, if it lives long enough to digest humans), then more like it will be manufactured. Survival of the fittest.


Taking your 787 as life analogy, I would be inclined to view it as life as Frankenstein's monster is life. It is assembled from bits from around the world, and I am involved in giving it it's brains. So I guess you could call me Igor.

Yethh Marthter....


Pointing out that the entertaining argument is a syllogistic fallacy highlighting not only am I a lazy lying weasel who reads Dilbert blogs at work but nerdish enough to think logic matters in humor.


This is ninth grade biology stuff and any ninth grader could prove you wrong. Any doubters of my criteria can see the wikipedia page on "Life".

Living Things Must:
Maintain Homeostasis
You have indicated that the 787 can maintain a constant internal environment. Good enough for me.
Be Made of Cells
Sorry, fail. The meaning of "cells" here is not open to interpretation beyond the biological definition.
Simple chemical reactions do not constitute metabolism; Wikipedia says it is "Consumption of energy by converting nonliving material into cellular components (anabolism) and decomposing organic matter (catabolism). Living things require energy to maintain internal organization (homeostasis) and to produce the other phenomena associated with life". The plane does not produce its own components through metabolism of fuel or people. Sorry.
Wikipedia says "A growing organism increases in size in all of its parts, rather than simply accumulating matter." Your beloved 787 fails to increase the size of its parts, though it is possible that an external force in its environment could increase the size of its parts without the 787's guidance or consent.
The 787 does not possess a suitable material for hereditary transmission of traits and even if it did it would not be able to pass it on to its offspring due to its method of "reproduction."
Respond to Stimuli
The 787 responds to stimuli in myriad ways and I can't say it doesn't.
To reproduce is to create copies of oneself. The 787s that are created are created by a different organism than the 787 and though this may be affected by the performance of the 787 population, it is not directly a result of the 787s reproducing.

All quotations here are from
as it was on the timestamp of this comment. Looks like I win this argument, though you may ridicule me for taking it so seriously.


is this your SGI movie plot, how enjoyable
everything, except of course the poop thing
a poop role could play f.e cargo - it's loaded and unloaded at the rear end of the jet, isn't it
humans are more like a soul, like humans in - the jet is alive,
at least the jet crew, if not passengers
sure, humans are somewhat too material for the soul thing
not that ephemeral-invisible
but it fits i think
with this slight modification i fully support the 787 - dinosaurs reincarnated theory

a dino cartoon, cute, a bit coldwar-ish (the ending)

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